


Home is Where the Heart is

by heatherlynn22



Category: Jake Jensen - Fandom, The Losers (2010), The Losers (Comic), The Losers - All Media Types
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Smut, Cunnilingus, Dirty Talk, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Eventual Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fingerfucking, First Christmas Together, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Friendship/Love, Fun, Goodbye Sex, Goodbyes, Holidays, Lingerie, Love, Mutual Masturbation, Oral Sex, Penis In Vagina Sex, Roleplay, Shower Sex, Welcome Home Sex, silly santa roleplay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-13
Updated: 2017-01-27
Packaged: 2018-09-08 07:50:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 24,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8836378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heatherlynn22/pseuds/heatherlynn22
Summary: Jensen and Quinn's first Christmas together doesn't go as planned.





	1. "Cross Bows"

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place after the Man Cubs series. But it will still makes sense if you haven't read it.

[ ](http://heather-lynn.tumblr.com/post/154385638823/warnings-none-summary-jensen-and-quinn-do-some)

 

 

 

 **Warnings:** None

 **Summary:** Jensen and Quinn do some last minute Christmas shopping for their boys and get some terrible news later that evening.

 **Word Count:** 4238

 **Special Thanks:** to [@ariallane](https://tmblr.co/mkYQVmH4b3yfVUmTSq1I27Q) and [@theycallmebecca](https://tmblr.co/mRBowAD6B9oYkCKqHhhXXFA) for beta reading and being all around awesome people! xo (one day I’ll figure out how to use commas! I promise! lol)

##  **[Part 1: “Crossbows”](http://heather-lynn.tumblr.com/post/154385638823/warnings-none-summary-jensen-and-quinn-do-some) **

“Oh come on! You gotta be shittin’ me, QBall.”

Quinn was caught red handed adding yet another outfit and a small baby toy for her goddaughter, Zoe, to their shopping cart.

“Shh babe.” Quinn looked around the department store and hoped that all the lovely Christmas shoppers weren’t listening to her annoyed boyfriend curse and whine at her.

“Dude?” he took the hint and took a step closer to her and lowered his voice. “Can you explain to me why a baby -”

“A very cute baby.” she playfully corrected.

“Yes. A very, very cute baby.” he tried not to smile and stay serious while he was chastising her, but couldn’t stop himself from smirking. The twinkle in her blue eyes was almost impossible to ignore.

He took a deep breath and tried to put his game face on.

“Quinn.” he tried again. “Zoe is adorable, I’ll give her that. She’s my little buddy. But she has no idea that it’s even fucking Christmas. Why is she getting a shit ton of presents and I can’t go nuts and spoil the hell outta of _my own kids_ on our _first_ Christmas together?”

Jensen had a point. A very valid point, but Quinn wasn’t planning on backing down anytime soon.

“Jensen. This is Zoe’s _first_ Christmas and she’s my _only_ god daughter. I’m allowed to spoil her, it’s in the awesome godmother job description. But we’re Coop and Jack’s parents, we have to be more responsible. We’re not allowed to spoil them, it’s parenting 101.”

He rolled his eyes and crossed his very large arms across his chest while he listened to her try and explain herself. He didn’t look convinced at all.

“Gimme a break, okay. I thought you were Mr. Grinchy Pants. Where’s all this Christmas spirit coming from anyway?”

“I’ll show you some Christmas spirit.” he playfully challenged and yanked her towards him by the small of her back.

He grabbed a fake mistletoe decoration from a nearby shelf and held it above them and kissed her smiling lips. Annoyed shoppers walked around them as she melted into his warm inviting body.

His soft lips felt amazing against hers. She gave in and kissed him back. He smelled so good she almost forgot where they were. He was getting excited and more forceful and flicked his tongue across her full bottom lip. She granted him access to her mouth and he reached his hand down and cupped her ass to pull her closer to his body.

She almost forgot what they were bickering about as her knees went weak. She pulled away from him before he could deepen the kiss even further and playfully smacked his arm.

“Nice try. But Zoe is still getting the outfit.”

“Fine.” he tossed the mistletoe into the cart. “But I’m going back and buying those two crossbows!” he countered and squeezed her butt.

Quinn was paranoid about spoiling the boys and buying too much for them for Christmas. For every three toys that Jensen put in the cart, she reluctantly put one (if not two) back on the shelf. The set of nerf crossbows, unfortunately, didn’t make the cut and Jensen was still bitter about it. She wanted the boys to have a great holiday, but refused to go overboard.

“No, Jensen. It’s too much.” she grabbed his arm before he could take off. She was serious about this.

She watched his face fall and felt like an asshole. She hated being such a buzzkill. They’ve been going back and forth about what to buy the boys for Christmas all morning when they already had a mountain of toys to wrap at home. As usual, he wanted to give them the moon and she was trying to put the brakes on. The conflict was giving her a tummy ache.

“Alright, you want the crossbows?”

He enthusiastically nodded his head. She did love how excited he was about the whole thing. He reminded her of a big happy puppy.

“Then let’s put the telescope back then?” she was trying her best to compromise. She hated disappointing him.

“ _Noooo._ The telescope is for camping. Come on, this is my first Christmas with them, Q.” he whined and seemed genuinely upset. It pulled on her heartstrings and for a second she almost reconsidered.

She was getting frustrated and tried to fight back tears. She didn’t know how to get her point across without snapping at him and acting like a crazy bitch. But he wasn’t hearing her.

“Let’s get outta here. I’m starting to feel claustrophobic.” she didn’t want to fight with him in the middle of the department store, she felt her temperature start to rise and ripped her scarf away from her neck.

Shopping for the boys was supposed to fun, she didn’t know how to explain to him that she was terrified of spoiling her kids for fear they would turn out like their biological father. Ryan lived a life of privilege, she doubted that anything was ever denied him while he was growing up (other than unconditional love, guidance, and boundaries) She saw first hand that money didn’t do him any favors as an adult. When she met him, untold damage was already done. As much as she tried to love away his issues, she couldn’t fix what his parents had broken in him.

That can never happen to Cooper and Jackson. Never.

The more she let those thoughts enter her mind the more panicked she started to feel. She knew in her head that her kids would never truly be like Ryan. They were sweet and grateful, she knew them better than she knew herself. But tucked away deep in her heart it was her biggest fear. She didn’t know how to vocalize it and keep her concerns suppressed.

She looked around the crowded department store and found it a little hard to breathe. She could have sworn that the walls were starting to close in on her.

“Whoa, whoa. You okay? Babe, look at me.”

Jensen could easily read how quickly the look on her face changed. She went from cute and adorable to terrified in a matter of moments and it snapped him out of his petulance.

“Can we go?…please.”

“Of course, babe.” he tried to get her to meet his concerned gaze but she kept looking away.

“We still have to go to Lush before we pick up the boys at your sister’s. Maybe we can get some coffee too?” her voice started to break and he quickly pulled her into his arms and smoothed her hair.

He still had no idea what was wrong, but she had all of his attention. He was no longer thinking about nerf crossbows. He kissed the top of her head and felt relieved when she wrapped her arms around his waist.

His little badass wasn’t crying though. He wished he could read her pretty little mind and figure out what was wrong.

They stood in silence in a very long line to pay for their items. Last minute holiday shoppers surrounded them everywhere. But that didn’t stop Jensen from either holding her close to his chest with his chin on top of her head or having one hand on her back the entire time. His protective loving touch helped calm and center her more than he knew.

She paid for their stuff and he still had no idea what set her off, but he watched her carefully and planned on finding out as soon as they got back to the truck.

She breathed in the cold air as soon as they hit the parking lot and they both noted that she started to feel more like herself.

“Hey? You gunna talk to me?” he asked once he had his seatbelt on. “What was with the freak out back there?”

“I just hate shopping.” that was only a half truth.

“Our master closet and your shoe collection would beg to differ…”

“Online shopping in your pajamas with a glass of wine and your puppies in your lap is a far cry from crowds of holiday shoppers a week before Christmas.” she teased.

“Jensen.” she took a deep breath and tried not to cry. “I don’t want to ruin our first Christmas together…I really don’t…I just-”

“You don’t wanna spoil them. I get it.” he finished her sentence for her, but he didn’t sound very convincing and she gave him a pointed look.

“We’re not spoiling them, Q.”

She puffed out a small laugh and rolled her eyes. He was running around the toy section like an 8 year old on a sugar bender, there was no way he understood where she was coming from.

“ _Heeey._ I just want this year to kickass. For them, not for me. You gotta relax.” he took a deep breath and tucked her hair behind her ear. “I’ve always hated Christmas, you know that. I’ve always made fun of it and avoided it. I never got anything cool as a kid. My parents were…”

“Baby, I know.” she instinctively took his hand and held it tight.

She could see his past childhood traumas playing out in his mind and wanted to pull him into the here and now with her where he belonged.

“I just wanna give the cubs the Christmas morning that I never got.”

“I know, and I love you for it, J. I really do.” She felt like a bigger asshole, his heart is always in the right place. The boys were so lucky to have him as their dad.

“Just don’t make me the bad guy okay. That’s not fair. We’ve already spent a small fortune on presents for them. They’re going to have a great Christmas morning. I can barely get into our storage unit as it is. It’s more important that we focus on holiday traditions and family time than material stuff. They’re going to forget about all this junk in a month or two, trust me. It’s the memories that we make as a family that are going to last. Please trust that I have my reasons.”

He knew that she was right on some level, but that giddy excitement he had wasn’t going away. The idea of making Cooper and Jackson’s faces light up on Christmas morning was way too tempting. Hearing them call him Daddy every day made him want to be the best father he could. He was still trying to figure out what that meant and how to pull it off.

He hated that Quinn still looked annoyed and little upset with him. Her little freak out in the store still bothered him. It wasn’t like her. He started to doubt himself and worried that he was overstepping.

As far as day to day raising the boys go, the two of them have always been on the same page. This is the first time that they have really disagreed on a parenting level. Maybe it wasn’t his place? Should he defer these kind of decisions to her?

“Am I fucking up?” he blurted out.  “I mean I’m not sure if I really get a say in all of this. You gotta let me know when I’m fuckin’ up babe…I don’t wanna fuck this up.”

“Noooo baby you’re not fucking up. Maybe I’m fucking up.” she played with her fingers in her lap. “It’s new for me you know? Sharing the kids with someone. Raising them with someone. It’s always been just me. But you get a say. You’re their dad. It’s not just a nickname. I wanna raise them with you. You’re their father.”

“Come ‘er.” he leaned towards her with a smirk on his face and tried to get her to look up at him.

“You know I love the shit outta you, right?”

“Yes. I am well aware.”

“Good. You’re the smarty pants in the family.”

He got a small smile out of her and leaned in closer and kissed her lips. The snow began to fall lightly onto the windshield as he deepened the kiss. She tasted like her cherry gum and her. What was it about this girl that made him want to make out in his truck like a teenager?

He dipped his tongue into her mouth wanting to taste more of her as she carded her fingers through his hair. He his heart started to pick up speed and he began to feel light headed when she let out a small involuntary moan from the back of her throat. That sound always made him hard.

“We have one more stop to make, babe.” she pulled away and sounded as breathless as he felt.

“Two. You wanted coffee right?” he tried to pull himself together and pretend as though he wasn’t just on the verge of fucking his girlfriend in the parking lot of a strip mall at 11am.

“Always. Coffee is always a must.” she kissed him quickly and put her seatbelt on.

“You do your girly shit and I’ll get the coffee.”

“Deal.”

Driving with Jensen was one of Quinn’s favorite things. He either held her hand or had his hand on her thigh. It was their thing.

She’d surf through all of her favorite radio stations and he’d try and sing along to just about any song that she found. Whether he actually knew the words or not. The best were the times that he made up the lyrics as he went.

He’d constantly tease her and try to get her to sing along with him but she always refused. She hated her singing voice. But having said that she could rap along to songs so well that he has doubled over in laughter more than once.

He brought her hand to his lips while they drove. Sometimes he’d do it without realizing what he was doing. He’d press his lips against her fingers while focusing on the road ahead. She loved that.

She loved the way he loved her, and she loved the way she loved him back. Other than her kids she’s never loved someone so completely before.

They had big plans for the holiday, they’ve been planning for weeks. The grinch in him had them waiting till the very last minute to get a Christmas tree. Christmas was only a week away, she’s never waited this long to set up her decorations before.

But he refused to use the artificial tree that she had stored away and vowed to take them all out into the wilderness to cut down _“Team Jensen’s First Christmas Tree.”_ She swore that he was going to have t-shirts made in honor of their great excursion, he was that excited.

Well, life went on and work and procrastination inevitably happened and that adventure hasn’t come to fruition. So they decided to compromise and go buy a real tree from a lot that weekend. Jensen had high hopes, but Quinn had visions of a sad little Charlie Brown tree being the only one left. The notion didn’t bother her much. In fact, she thought it would be kinda charming and cute. Plus it would serve him right for stalling.

They were also going to go sledding on Christmas Eve with Annie and Alyssa. That seemed to be the only Jensen family tradition that they had. They both still tried to honor it every year they could.

As kids, Jensen and Annie would sneak out of their house late Christmas Eve and toboggan down a nearby hill. There were sad memories attached as to why the two of them felt the need to escape their home in the middle of the night, but Quinn chose to focus on how fun it was going to be for the kids. The idea of creating new memories and traditions with Jensen made her beyond happy.

“So what’s the big deal with Lush anyway.” he asked as he pulled into the parking space. “Why couldn’t you buy this shit at the other mall?”

“ _Ohhh baby._ Lush is…” she tried to come up with the right word. “Lush is LUSH.”

He laughed at how animated she got talking about bath bombs and face masks. He loved that girly side of her.

“Quit your laughin’. The soap you like is from here by the way.”

“ _Ohhh!_ The scratchy soap?” his ears seem to perk up like a puppy.

“The word you’re looking for is _‘exfoliating’_ , and yeah. I like to treat my man to a little Lush goodness every now and again.” she teased seductively and kissed the corner of his mouth.

“You ARE my little lush goodness, get back here.” his eyes never left her lips as he pulled her in for another kiss.

At this rate, their Christmas shopping was going to be finished sometime in February, but they couldn’t care less. There were no kids around to interrupt their PDA so they enjoyed each other. Soon they were enjoying each other a little too much.

Jensen had to put on the breaks when her roaming hands found his skin and tickled his stomach under his shirt. She was practically in his lap and she smelled so good. God knows that he didn’t want her to stop, but the faster they get these errands done, the faster he can get his girl home and get her naked. But he had to admit, if it wasn’t the middle of the afternoon he’s sure he’d be balls deep sitting in the driver’s seat of his truck already.

“I’ll grab the coffee’s and you do your Lush thing, ok?”

“Gotcha.”

They met back at the truck 20 minutes later. Jensen had a little surprise for her burning a hole in his pocket, but had to do a double take when he saw her walking towards the truck. He could not believe the amount of bags she came back with.

“How much scratchy soap did you buy?” he teased as he tried to take her bags and hand her her coffee at the same time.

“Enough scratchy soap for Mallory, Annie, Jolene, Mrs. Alvarez, Ms. Arial, my lawyer Ali, my illustrator Becca, my public relations rep Erica…” she kept counting off names of all the various women in her life and the motherload of shopping bags started to make sense. “…and a ton of stuff for Charlie and Zach, they love Lush…Oh! And there’s some stuff in here for Clay too. But don’t tell him I said that.”

“Ok ok, Qball, I gotcha.” he chuckled.

“I got you some scratchy soap, too, my love.” she kissed him on the cheek before she jumped into the truck. She also got him a super secret sappy surprise that she couldn’t wait to give him and made sure to hide it under a few bath bombs.

“Score! Merry Christmas to ME. You gunna scrub my back?”

“You betcha!” she teased and sipped her drink.

She was so impressed that he remembered her favorite holiday drink order.

This Christmas was going to be awesome.

———————————————

“Quinn?”

Jensen’s voice didn’t sound like his. She knew something was terribly wrong.

After dinner, he just got a call on his work cell and went to answer it in their bedroom. She didn’t think twice about it and went to make another batch of Christmas cookies.

She stopped mixing her batter and spun around to find out what was wrong. She turned so suddenly she accidently spilled sprinkles all over the counter.

He stood in the doorway to the kitchen and couldn’t look her in the eye. He looked pale, and his eyes were red and glassy. She feared the worst and her heart dropped in her chest.

“What happened?”

“Come here.”

He took three forceful strides towards her before he grabbed her and pulled her into a strong tight hug.

He buried his face into her hair and held her so close she could barely move. She felt his chest shake as he tried to hold in his sobs. She squeezed him back and tried to comfort him.

“Baby, you’re scaring me. Who was on the phone? Talk to me.”

He stood up straighter and tried to clear his throat. He held her but, still couldn’t look at her.

“We’re getting shipped out.” he spit out his words so fast, as if it was one word.

“When?”

“Tomorrow morning 0800 hours.” he dropped his shoulders and ran his hand down his chin.

He looked so distant, she feared she already knew the answer but had to ask anyway.

“Will you be home for Chris-”

“No baby.” he cut her off and shook his head. He still had to look away from her. Breaking the news to her seemed to physically hurt him.

It felt like the rug had been pulled out from underneath her. But for as sad as she felt, it was nothing compared to what the boys were going to feel or the look of shame and regret on Jensen’s face.

“I’m so fucking sorry. The _one_ year…” he choked on a sob and tried to clear his throat. “The one fucking year that I actually give a shit…”

“It’s going to be okay.” she ran her hands under the back of his t shirt and rubbed his back.

She tried to believe in her own words and make them sound convincing. There was no reason for both of them to fall apart. But she was devastated, she didn’t want him to go. She never wanted to him to go, but especially not during the holidays.

“I always take missions and extra shifts during the holidays so guys with families can be with their kids…and now when I’m finally a family man, no one…” he bitterly shook his head and tried not to say something he knew he’d regret. “There’s no one else to take my place.”

“It’s going to be okay.” she repeated.

But as the reality of the situation began to sink in the more devastated she felt. This wasn’t fair.

“I’ve always ran away from Christmas and Santa and all this bullshit. Maybe this is my karma.”

“No, baby, karma doesn’t work like that. You’re a good man.” she reached up and played with the soft hair on the back of his neck. It hit her that tomorrow he would be leaving and she wouldn’t be able to touch him like that anymore.

He looked so sad. She swallowed down the hard lump in her throat. She was determined to try and make this as okay for him as she could. Looking after him was such an honest and sincere reflex. She immediately put his feelings before her own.

“I’ll take a ton of pictures and tape the whole thing. We’ll do something special with the kids when you get back. Will the team be home for New Years Eve?”

They all had plans to ring in the new year together. She was hoping to actually see Clay and Mallory in full couple mode. Jensen already had crazy sunglasses and noise makers bought for them. They were both going to look ridiculous and she loved it. He confessed that he was looking forward to finally kissing the right girl at midnight.

“I don’t know, babe. I fucking hope so, but I really don’t think we’ll make it. You should still go out with Mallory and Annie though. Get all dolled up and try and have a good night. Just know I’ll be thinking of you during the countdown.”

She smiled up at him and nodded when his voice broke. He studied her face and saw that her smile didn’t reach her eyes. She was trying to hard to make him feel better. It almost broke him. He closed his eyes and pulled her into another tight embrace.

“I’m so fucking sorry. I’ll find a way to make it up to you.”

“Shh.” she shushed him and pulled away. “You.” she took a trembling breath and tried to stay strong. “You my love have nothing to be sorry for.” she meant it and placed her hand over his heart. “This isn’t your fault, it’s not like you have a choice.”

“It still sucks donkey cock.”

“Yeah it does. But we’re gunna have _sooooo_ many more Christmas’s and New Year’s to celebrate.”

“I know.”

He checked his watch. “It’s still early. Let’s get the boys bundled up. I’m gunna at least buy you guys a tree, the lot should still be open for a few more hours.”

“You take the boys. I’ll stay here and fish out the decorations and finish the cookies. I’ll have some hot chocolate waiting for you guys when you get back. We’ll have a little mini holiday tonight.”

“You’re the best, babe.”

He cupped her face with both hands and pulled her into into a long slow loving kiss. He poured all of himself into his kiss. She felt how much he loved her and loved him back in kind.

“You really are the best, Quinn. Meeting you was the best damn thing that ever happened to me….” he tucked her hair behind her ears and gently brushed the pad of his thumb cross her cheek. “I’m so fucking sorry.”

“I know you are. I’m so sorry that you’re going to miss your first Christmas with the kids.”

“My first Christmas with _you_.” he sadly added.

She held back her tears and smiled a big bright happy smile at him until he left the room to get the boys ready.

Once she heard the front door close and knew that she was alone she sunk down at sat on the kitchen floor. She let her sadness and disappointment finally wash over her. The two dogs could sense that their mama was sad and joined her on the floor.

The dam broke and she buried her face in her hands and tried to sob too loud.

 


	2. "Duty Calls"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jensen brings a Christmas home a tree for his family the night before he leaves for his mission.

[ ](http://heather-lynn.tumblr.com/post/154696328838/home-is-where-the-heart-is-warnings-none-summary)

 

##  **Home is Where the Heart is**

 

Jensen and the boys were gone for at least two hours, maybe a little bit longer. Quinn was still in a mild state of shock, so she couldn’t accurately tell how long they were gone for. She couldn’t believe that this was happening to them.

Jensen was not going to be there for Christmas. He was getting called away for their very first Christmas together as a family. All of the new traditions and holiday memories that they wanted to share would never happen. Not this year anyway. She tried to accept the truth and let it seep in. She had to be a grown up and rally for the sake of him and her kids.

He insisted that he was not going to leave for his mission without getting them a Christmas tree. He felt like it was the least he could do. For as terrible as she felt about their situation, she knew that he felt ten times worse.

While her little family was gone, Quinn took some time to cry her little heart out on the kitchen floor and finish baking a new batch of Christmas cookies for the kids. She tried hard to put her game face on, but she took one look at herself in the mirror and knew that Jensen would be able to tell that she had been crying. She vowed not to make this harder on him then it already was.

She was in the hallway bathroom trying to fix her makeup when she heard them coming through the front door. They were finally back, but they didn’t sound very happy.

_“COOPER! Come on buddy. Please. You gotta help us with the tree.”_

_“Daddy is sworry Coop!”_

_“NOOOO! It’s not FAIR!”_

Little angry determined feet were heard stomping across her hardwood floor followed by the loud slam of a what she assumed was the boy’s bedroom door.

Oh shit. Cooper was pissed. Jensen must have broken the news to the boys while they were gone. She wished that Jensen would have waited and let the two of them tell them together. But a part of her was relieved that she didn’t have to do it.

She figured her oldest son would take it the worst. A fresh stab of pain crossed her already broken heart. She would give anything to fix this for her little guy.

She couldn’t really blame Coop. Afterall he was right. This sure as fuck wasn’t fair. Jensen should be waking up with his man cubs on Christmas morning wearing his silly Santa hat and his funny Christmas sweaters. The two of them should be sneaking kisses under the mistletoe and spoiling each other. He shouldn’t be shipping out to god knows where.

She bitterly cursed whatever bad guys that they were fighting for not take a time out for the holidays. But all that really mattered was that he came home safely. Everything else was just details.

Quinn took another look at herself in the mirror and took a deep breath. She still looked terrible but it would have to do. She had to pull herself together for her family. Tonight was the only “Christmas” they were going to have together. She wanted to make the most of it. She knew that she needed to set the example and put a smile on her face. If Cooper and Jack could see her laugh and enjoy herself then maybe they would too.

She can pout and wallow tomorrow when Jensen was gone and the kids had their playdate at Annie’s. She took another deep breath and blinked away her tears. Fuck, she was really going to miss Jensen once he was gone. Just thinking about it crushed her.

But she knew what she was in for when they started dating. Absences were part of the deal. All in all, it was a fair tradeoff for how happy he made her and the boys. She couldn’t imagine her life without him.

She went out into the living room to assess the situation before she checked on Cooper. She couldn’t help but smile watching Jensen and Jackson try and pull a decent sized tree in through the door. Well, Jensen was pulling it. Jack was trying with all his might but wasn’t really doing much. His little tongue was sticking out of the side of his mouth as he concentrated.

It was such a cute sight. She pulled out her phone from her back pocket and took a few shots of the two of them struggling together.

“Hey there Mama Bear.” he sang out once he saw her. He was trying to pretend that getting the tree through the door was a piece of cake.

He managed to lean the tree against the wall and they posed for a few pictures. The two of them were the biggest goofballs when a camera was on them. She tried to hold her phone steady through her giggles.

Once they were done making faces and pretending to flex their muscles for their little photoshoot Jensen tossed his winter hat on the couch and pulled her into a hug.

His cheeks were cold against hers but she didn’t care. She squeezed him back and tried not to cry.

“Thank you for my tree Papa Bear. I love it.” she could feel his big proud smile against her neck. “I have some hot chocolate ready for you guys.” 

He groaned in delight and squeezed her tighter. He always gave the best hugs, they always made her feel so safe and loved.

“No _thank you!_ I was freezing my balls off!”

He grabbed her butt with both hands and lifted her feet from the floor. She was very familiar with the drill and wrapped her legs around his waist.

She giggled and squirmed when he rubbed his cold beard against her cheek and down her neck. He wanted to lighten the mood and get her to laugh. That was never much of a challenge for him.

“Marshmallows Mommy?”

“Of course my little love. Go wait in the kitchen.” she answered with her chin resting Jensen’s shoulder.

His face was buried deep between her shoulder and her neck. He was squeezing her so tight and refusing to let her go. She wrapped her arms around his neck and squeezed him back. She could tell that he was upset about Cooper.

“It’s all on the stove ready to go J. Go get Jack a cup and I’ll talk to Coop.”

“He hates me,” he mumbled into her shoulder. “My man cub hates my fucking guts. I don’t really blame him.”

As strong as her big army guy was, a six year old boy had the power to completely destroy him and break his heart.

“Don’t say that. He’s upset _because_ he loves you so much.”

He put her down on her feet and pressed his cold lips to her forehead.

“I hate this.” he confessed against her skin.

“I know babe. I’ll talk to him. Go hang out with Jack and set the tree up in the corner. I moved everything out of the way.”

“Thanks, at least Jack’s still talking to me.”

She puffed out a small laugh and gave him a sweet smile. She wasn’t sure if Jackson even knew how to be truly mad at someone.

“Just don’t forget his marshmallows or all bets are off….you can bribe him with some sprinkles if you want, they’re in the cupboard.” she called out over her shoulder.

“Already plannin’ on it QBall!”

——————————————————–

“Coop?” Quinn knocked softly on his bedroom door and opened it slowly, unsure of what she was going to find.

Puzzled, she looked scanned the room and she didn’t see him anywhere. There was only one place he could be.

Fort Petunia. His little “Fortress of Solitude.”

“Hey buddy.” she could see his little feet sticking out of the little door. He was pouting and laying down on his tummy. “Got room in there for one more?”

Quinn opened the door to her son’s little playhouse teepee and watched him reluctantly sit up and move over to give her room to sit beside him. He wasn’t crying, but he was angry and deep in thought. Her heart broke for him.

“So Daddy told you and your brother that he has to leave tomorrow huh?”

“Yeah. Uncle Clay too.” he stared at the ground and pressed his little lips together.

“How do you feel about that?”

“I hate this.”

She smiled to herself, knowing that Jensen had just said those exact same words to her not more than two minutes ago. They were more alike than they realized.

“Yeah,…I hate it too baby. We’re all feeling the same way you know?”

“I thought you said he wanted to be my dad?” he spat out.

“Cooper! Of course he does!” she was shocked that he would doubt Jensen’s commitment to him.

“We were supposed to watch Christmas movies and go sledding with Lyssa, and stay up late and lay traps to catch Santa. He promised!” his voice was close to breaking.

“I know. He doesn’t want to leave. But we can still do all those things. You, me, and Jack.”

He nodded his little head but didn’t look any happier.

“I’m going to miss him too buddy. But he’ll be back before we know it. Uncle Clay and the rest of the guys need him. He wouldn’t be leaving us if it wasn’t important.”

“Christmas is important too…it doesn’t matter…He’s dumb. He’s not my real dad anyway.”

“Cooper Franklin Andrews!” to hear her son speak with such venom in his voice appalled and angered her. He was trying to be as hurtful as he could and she wasn’t going to let his behaviour go unchecked.

“You do _NOT_ mean that! Mean words like that can hurt. You will _NOT_ speak like that again, do you understand?” his little lip began to quiver at her harsh and serious tone.

The one thing Cooper Andrews hated more than anything in the world was being chastised by his mother. He looked so small looking up at her. His big green eyes were so sad. She pulled him into her lap and he rested his head on her chest.

“I know that you are angry,” she explained with her chin on the top of his head. “I’m angry too. But none of this is your dad’s fault.”

She began to rock him back and forth like she did when he was a baby. There wasn’t much room in their little teepee so his feet were sticking out of the door.

“Sweetheart listen to me. I know you’re hurting. I am too. But cha know what? Daddy is hurting just as much as we are.” she smoothed his soft shaggy blond hair and kissed the top of his head. “You’re never going to make yourself feel better by hurting someone else. Especially someone that you love. Trust me on this Coop. If you lash out you’re just going to end up feeling worse.”

Fat tears began to fall down his cheeks. She was harsh with him and hoped that she didn’t make the situation worse.

“I’m sorry mommy. I didn’t mean it.” he sobbed.

“I know baby…I know.” she kissed his hair and felt her own tears well in her eyes.

“Let’s try and make the best of the time that we do have ok. We’ll have some cookies and hot chocolate and decorate the tree….whaddya say?”

He held on to her a little tighter and nodded his head in agreement.  He felt so innocent and young in her arms. She could tell that he was summoning all the courage in his little six year old heart to put aside his anger and follow her advice. He was so young, she wished that he didn’t have to learn these lessons at such a young age. But she couldn’t have loved him more for trying.

“He loves you, Coop… Gosh, does he ever love you. I know he does. He loves you and your brother more than anything in the whole wide world.”

_“Your mom’s pretty smart Coop. I’d listen to her.”_

Jensen’s sad deep voice could be heard just outside Fort Petunia. It made both of them jump. She had no idea how long he was there.

_“If you guys wanna chill in there you can, but Jack and I got the tree setup in the living room if you wanna help us out?”_

He sounded hopeful but a little choked up. He must have been listening for awhile.

Cooper squirmed off her lap and crawled out the front flaps of the teepee. Quinn took a deep breath and wiped her eyes before she did the same.

Once she very ungracefully found her way out of Fort Petunia, Jensen pivoted away from her quickly with Cooper in his arms. She suspected that he didn’t want her to see the tears in his eyes, but they were obvious. The two of them were holding on to each other so tight, the raw emotion made her heart hurt just looking at them.

“More than anything in the _whole wide world_ Coop. I promise.” she heard him say into his son’s little ear as he carried him down the hall.

————————–

“Come ‘er pretty lady.”

Jensen wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her closer to him. As usual, she smelled like coconuts and vanilla. He ran his nose up her neck and enjoyed her signature scent.

He squeezed her tighter and looked around the room over her shoulder. Trimming the tree was going great. The whole house was almost completely decorated. Quinn had so much stuff stored away it was a little crazy. Two days ago he would have bitched and moaned and made fun of her for taking the holidays so seriously, but now he was grateful for his little Christmas freak.

Everyone was happy and seemed to forget that he was shipping out in the morning. He credited the crazy amount of sugar the kids had ingested over the last few hours. “No” was not something that they were hearing a lot of that night.

The sugary treats weren’t the only thing that was keeping everyone’s spirits high. Quinn was working overtime trying to make the night perfect for him and the kids. Her efforts were not lost on him. He wondered how she was really feeling about the whole situation. He planned on getting her to open up once the kids were in bed.

Cooper’s attitude had greatly improved since they got home. But he has noticed that he has barely left his side since they left his bedroom. His little buddy stuck to him like glue. He tried to give him his undivided attention. He seemed to need the one-on-one time more than Jack did.

Coopers angry words still stung and rang in his ears. He understood. The little guy was pissed off and trying to hurt him. He got it. He forgave him the second he lashed out. But he still felt like shit for disappointing him.

“What? Where am I going?”

Quinn sounded confused while he pulled her over to the tree.

 _“Bear Mama putting Yoda on top. You are.”_ he answered in his best Yoda voice.

“ _Meeee?_ ” she giggled while he nuzzled and peppered kissed down the side of her neck. “Really? Don’t the kids wanna do it?”

Usually putting the topper on the tree was an honor that one of the kids usual had. Every year she would lift one of them up high to do it, or if Clay was in town he would put them on his shoulders.

“Nope, Jack said it’s your turn shorty. _Jump on my back you will._ ”

She had all of the tree decorations laid out on the coffee table and he couldn’t believe that instead of a classic star or an angel, his little dork had a Yoda Christmas tree topper. The little Jedi master even held a glowing green lightsaber. He doubled over laughing when she broke out a little santa hat for him to wear.

On second thought, of course she had Yoda tree topper. He shook his head and realized for the millionth time that this girl was absolutely perfect for him.

He turned around and motioned for her to leap up on his back. She jumped as best as she could and he shimmied and positioned her weight better. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed the back of neck. He heard her let out a little soft groan when she pressed her lips to his skin. He squeezed her legs a little harder and tried to control himself.

They stood in front of the tree and took a moment to admire it in all its glory. He could feel her smile against his neck and it made his heart swell. He wanted nothing more in the world then to make her happy. He just wanted to stand there with her on his back for a minute and try and take a mental picture of this happy moment.

It was fun having the whole family decorate the tree. It was worth the arm and a leg he paid for it at the last minute at the lot. He’s never really trimmed a tree before. Growing up, his mother would lose her shit if anything was out of place and would never in a million years consider letting him or Annie anywhere near it while she was decorating. That is, if they even had a tree. Some years she wouldn’t even bother.

But not his QBall. She had a few decorations that were off limits to the kids, but for the most part it was a free for all. You could see how tall the kids were based on high the ornaments were on the tree. It was charming. It was a mess. But a funny, colorful, charming mess. Kinda like them.

It choked him up a little. This mess of a tree is exactly the kinda tree that he wanted his kids to have. As corny as it sounds the tree was all for them. All he saw was fun and love.

“Ok guys. You ready?”

Their little heads nodded happily as they watched their mom reach up as high as she could and place a very festive looking Jedi master on the top of the tree.

“There! It’s perfect!” she squealed.

He had to agree with her.

Next year. He told himself. Next year they’ll have all of this all over again. Then many many more to come.

He chilled on the couch and watched his little family joke around and play with the dogs while they watched Christmas movies and cartoons. He laughed at Jack trying his best to sing along to “The Grinch Who Stole Christmas” Jack knew all the songs and Cooper could recite all the dialogue. They took after their mom.

He was very impressed that Duke kept his little Santa hat on for the majority of the night. Daisy shook hers off as soon as the pictures were taken. The kids were so happy, it was almost too good.

He’d catch Quinn’s eye a few times from the other side of the couch. He couldn’t look too long or the sadness that she tried to hide behind her blue eyes was going to break him.

He was trying so damn hard to hold everything together but he felt like such an asshole for having to leave them. It was making it worse that she was trying to be so cool about it.

He almost wished she’d freak out and scream at him. He felt that was more of what he deserved. Not all of this loving, stoic patience. She truly was his little badass. They more he thought about it the more he was convinced that he didn’t deserve her.

Jack was the first to fall asleep against his mom. She let him snooze against her and played with his dark hair while she watched the movie. Cooper was fighting sleep with everything he had.

“Come on little dude. Let’s get in your pajamas and I’ll read you a book ok.”

His little eyes looked so heavy as he looked up at him and nodded. He always knew that they were his kids. But there were times that it hit him so hard, it felt like he was getting hit upside the head with a two by four.

He looked down at Coopers little sleepy face and knew that he loved that kid so much that the sheer force of it could rip him in two.

He was going to make this up to them. Somehow.

—————————————————–

It was getting late. Jensen carried Cooper into his bedroom and came back a few minutes for Jackson. She offered to help but he insisted that he wanted to do it himself.

He was trying to smile and crack jokes like he didn’t have a care in the world. But she knew him better than that. He was the funniest man she has ever met. He could always make her laugh and lighten the most stressful of situations with his humor. But the truth was he was hurting and he didn’t want her to see him upset. His humor is what she loved about him the most, but she also knew that it was a coping mechanism.

When was he going to learn that she didn’t care about that? She could never think less of him. Seeing how much her kids met to him made her love him more and more every single day.

She looked around her living room and waited for Jensen to come back out. It was like the North Pole had exploded all over her house. The whole livingroom glowed with the colorful lights. Maybe she did go a little overboard. She just wanted to make it as special as she could. It wouldn’t be the first time she has been accused of being a Christmas freak.

She got up from the couch and pulled out a package that had come earlier that month from NY. She was hoping it was from her literary agent Charlie and his husband Zach and she was right. They had the same tradition every year. They would send each other a tacky or vulgar Christmas ornament for their respective trees. She loved it. Charlie and Zach weren’t very Christmasy people, this was their way to tease her for going all out every year and forcing them to participate in the holiday.

She started laughing to herself as she went through the box. This year they and sent a set of ten Christmas balls with funny and inappropriate stuff written all over them. She loved them. But it warmed her heart to see that they broke with tradition and added a sappy cute one to mark their daughter Zoe’s first Christmas, and her first Christmas being her godmother. Becoming parents was seemingly changing their grinchy ways in the same way that they were changing Jensen’s. Kids will do that to you. You start to see things through their eyes and get happy when they are happy. She loved seeing how fatherhood was changing all three of them.

She hung a few of them up high on tree. There were so many bare spaces on the upper half of the tree thanks to the kid’s height and their limited decorating skills. The funny cursing ones were high enough up that she figured the kids wouldn’t be able to read them. She took a moment and admired all the family milestone ornaments that she’s collected over the years and remembered the present she bought for Jensen earlier that day when she was shopping at Lush.

She tiptoed passed the boy’s room and rummaged through her many bags and found what she was looking for.

Jensen was very carefully closing the boys door while she was making her way back to the living room. She hid her small package behind her back

“Heeey babe. Did they go down okay?” she whispered.

“Yeah. Coop was fighting it, but he passed out.” he went to pull her into a hug but she jumped back a bit with a small smile on her face.

“Come on.” she motioned to the direction of the living room with her head and he raised an inquisitive eyebrow. “I have something to give you.”

“I have something to give you too…” his eyes darkened and she felt her heart start beating a little faster. “..but I was thinkin’ I’d like to get you naked first.” he pressed his forehead against hers as he spoke.

“Hmmm.” she hummed and rubbed her nose against his.

He was making her forget what she was talking about. He brushed his full bottom lip lightly against hers ever so slightly. He smelled so good she was starting to get lightheaded.

Before she knew what was happening he reached behind her and snatched his present out of her hands and took off running towards the living room.

“You dirty sneak!” she called out and ran after him.

“I’m just kiddin’ come ‘er.”

He pulled her against him and kissed her hard and made sure that they landed softly on the couch without separating their lips.

“Open it.” she purred

“Now?”

“Yeah.”

She kissed and sucking down his neck and her hands roamed under his t-shirt and played with his chest hair. She could tell that she was responding well to her touch, by the way his fingers fumbled with the small package. Not to mention how his jeans were beginning to tent.

He finally ripped through the small present and pulled out the personalized family ornament she picked up for him earlier that day.

“Team Jensen” and the year, surrounded by four snowmen that had all of their names written on it. There were even two personalized dogs on it too.

“You’re shittin’ me!” he had the biggest smile on his face and shook his head in disbelief.

“Do you like it?”

“I love it…I love it so much that I bought you one too.”

“You’re kidding!”

He got up and fished a similar sized package out of his winter coat and tossed it to her.

“We must have gone to the same shop. I like yours better we can scrap mine.” he joked while she ripped away the colorful paper like an excited five year old.

“Not a chance! …Aw baby. I really love it.”

Hers was different. This one had no dogs and it said “The Jensen-Andrews Family” and instead of personalized snowmen, he had chosen Christmas stockings. She loved that instead of their names he had it personalized with “Papa Bear”and “Mama Bear”

She found a spots on the tree for her new favorite ornaments and Jensen turned off all the lights in the living room. The only light in the room came from their colorful christmas tree.

He wrapped his arms her and left wet open mouthed kisses up and down the side of her neck. He was slow and loving. His soft lips were exploring and truly savouring her. The tickle of his beard made her squirm but he held onto her tighter and press his impressive erection against her hip. She was getting wet and hummed in response.

“I’ll be right back. I have another surprise for you.”

“It can wait.” he groaned through his teeth and started to fondle and squeeze her breasts over her t-shirt. 

He didn’t want anything else. Only her.

“It’s a sexy surprise.” she purred.

He brought her face to his and kissed her, this time much more passionately. She felt her knees go weak and had to lean up against him. Boy did that man ever know how to kiss.

He gave her a sly devilish smile and slapped her ass as she left the room.

“You should text your sister and let her know that you’re leav- let her know what’s going on.” she called out from the hallway.

Shit why did she have to bring that up? Saying it out loud physically hurt.

“My sister? Why you tryin’ to kill my boner?” he teased.

“Trust me, it will be alive and well in about five minutes.” she seductively teased and gave him a wink while she headed to their room.

“Maybe it’ll need a little mouth to mouth resuscitation.” he called out to the back of her head.

“You’re the worst!” she laughed. “Just gimme five and make yourself comfortable. I don’t plan on sleeping much tonight, is that okay?”

“I’m game for an all nighter QBall. If you’re not back here in five minutes I’m comin’ ta git ya!”

“Keep your pants on J… well on second thought.”

He could hear her giggling all the way down to their room. He loved the sound of that. If they couldn’t spend their first Christmas together then he wanted to make the most of the ten hours that they did have before he shipped out. An all nighter with his his girl sounded perfect before duty calls and takes him away.

 


	3. "A Very Quinsen Christmas"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jensen and Quinn try and have their own little Christmas the night before he leaves for his mission.

 

 

 

**Special Thanks:** To [@thelookingglassalice](https://tmblr.co/mKYvRlHhpH3cqA2Z2JV_6IQ) for tagging me in **[THIS](http://heather-lynn.tumblr.com/post/154823476168/thelookingglassalice-heather-lynn-jensen-needs) **[@theycallmebecca](https://tmblr.co/mRBowAD6B9oYkCKqHhhXXFA) for tagging me in some [**great inspo** ](http://quinsen-afterdark.tumblr.com/post/154925486563)and to everyone reading this. I hope you all have a wonderful time over the holidays, I love your guts! xo

##  **Part 3: “A Very Quinsen Christmas”**

Quinn’s whole body was humming with excitement when she pulled out her Agent Provocateur shopping bag from the back of her closet.

She dumped the contents of the bag out on the bed and wondered if she was in over her head? She could pull off her “sexy surprise” right?

She bought Jensen so much stuff for Christmas but decided on a whim to treat them both to some nice new fancy lingerie. She was planning on breaking it out on christmas eve, but since Jensen was sadly leaving, tonight would have to do.

She stripped out of her clothes and put on her new ridiculously expensive black lace corset and matching lace thong. She was dressed in record time thanks to the front zipper. She had more trouble lining up the back seam on her matching thigh high stockings.

She took a quick look at herself in the mirror. Her makeup had held up well enough, you could barely tell she spent the better part of the evening crying. She was so excited to get back out to the living room with Jensen, there was no way she was going to waste time and fuss too much.

She fluffed up her hair and messed it up. She was trying to make it look big and sexy but she ended up looking ridiculous and quickly smoothed it out again with her fingers. She took a deep steadying breath and slipped on a pair of her highest black heels. She pushed up her boobs and tried to showcase them properly. She looked like pure sex, it was a little overwhelming and didn’t quite feel like her.

At the last minute she grabbed a Santa hat that was sitting on her dresser and put it on to complete the look. She looked a little cute and silly now, it made her feel a bit more like herself. Here goes nothing. She really hoped that he liked it.

Jensen had his back to her while did her best to walk confidently into the livingroom. He slipped his phone into the back pocket of his jeans and turned around to greet her when her heard her coming.

“ _Ho-ly shiiit.”_

His mouth fell open as his eyes drank her in from head to toe. He went from shocked and almost helpless looking to darkly seductive in a manner of moments. It was almost as if after the surprise wore off he realized that all of this was for him and that he could touch her.

“Merry Christmas Baby.” she rested her hand on her hip and tried to strike a sexy pose. “You like?” she bit her bottom lip and tried not to smile too big at his reaction.

The way he as looking at her was everything she wanted. In seconds, he made her feel like the most desirable woman in the world. She made a mental note to dress up from him more often. She didn’t know what she was so worried about, this was fun.

“No babe. I fuckin’ hate it.” he sarcastically teased as he circled around her.

She could feel his eyes on her, almost like a hunter stalking his prey. He hadn’t even touched her yet and she felt her pussy tingle and a warm flush wash over her skin.

“You’re like a present, I wanna unwrap you but…I kinda wanna just look at you too.”

The tips of his fingers skirted over the exposed skin of her ass. It almost tickled he was so gentle. It gave her goose flesh and made the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. She was so tuned into him she could feel him all around her.

The thin lace of her small thong was pretty much ruined at this point. She tried not to pant and to control her breathing but she wanted him so badly. She could feel his breath on the back of her neck and it sent a delicious shiver down her spine.

She started to wonder if this was as wet as she’s ever been. She licked her lips and waited for his next move, but it never came.

“Baby quit teasing and unwrap your present.” she was only half joking. She was so ready for him. But he was still behind her checking her out, the anticipation was killing her.  

“Fuck, I love you so much it hurts. Did you know that?”

He reached around her and placed his large hand on her lower stomach and pulled against his firm muscular chest so hard that she nearly bounced. She teetered slightly in her heels but his large arm held her strong and in place.

“It fucking _hurts_ Quinn. I wanna remember all of you.”

His voice was so strong, rich and full of emotion. She believed him and knew he meant every word. He hated leaving her, he was going to make her cry.

All she wanted to do was send him off with a good proper fun fuck. She made sure that she was dressed for the occasion. But he started gently kissing her neck in a way that made her feel like he had other plans. He just wanted to love her.

“I love you too. You need to know that…” she wasn’t sure if he was listening.

His mouth was picking up speed and kissing and sucking on any exposed skin that he could find. The groans coming from the back of his throat made her feel like he was in his own world. He was worshipping her and lost in his thoughts. His large erection was pressing insistently into her hip. She needed to love him back.

She spun around quickly, taking him off guard and pulled his face towards her mouth. She was tired of the tease and took matters into her own hands. She wasn’t sure how to communicate how much she truly loved him and let her lips and tongue express it for her. All she wanted to do was to make him feel as loved and as special as he made her feel.

He kissed her back and grabbed her ass hard and pulled her against him. He repeated that movement again and again. It was almost like he could stand there being any distance between their bodies and had to have her flush against him.

His strong hands kneaded her ass and made her gasp into his mouth. She pulled up on the hem of his t-shirt and he pulled it over his head for her.

Once their lips were separated she kissed and licked his warm chest. His hands were buried in her hair as she nuzzled her face against his chest hair. She could feel how hard his heart was beating against her cheek and was sure that her heartbeat matched his own.

“I love you so much Jake. Everything is going to be okay I promise… fuck I love you so much.”

He nodded and pulled her face up to hers and kissed her deeply. Hearing her reassurance was exactly what he needed. They stood there and continued kissing in the middle of their dimly lit living room. The only light came from the colorful lights on their christmas tree. They kissed till their lips felt numb, each giving up control and dominance and letting the other take over again and again. Their own special dance.

“Sit down on the couch.” he finally requested against her lips.

She pressed her swollen lips together and nodded her head. He asked her in his sexy deep voice but made no move to let her go or open his eyes. She could still taste him in her mouth and wanted more, he smelled so good she felt a little drunk on him. She kissed his chin and flicked her tongue down his neck. She popped the button of his jean and freed his hard warm cock. She stroked him slowly and waited for him to snap out of his trance.

He was enjoying her touch but pulled her away and motioned to the sofa. Her legs felt wobbly and weak in her high heels, so he took her hand and helped sit. He pulled the coffee table closer to the couch and sat on the edge of it, facing her.

“I wanna watch you.” he licked his lips and ran is hands up and down her thighs before he peeled her stockings off her long legs. He just wanted to feel her skin, but was quick to put her heels back on her feet, they were his favorite.

“Really?”

“You look amazing. You always look so fucking hot…but this..” he motioned to her corset. “Is some next level shit…and this is sorta adorable too.” he flicked at the pompom on the end of her santa hat.

She smirked at him as he spread her legs apart. He loved watching her get herself off, this wasn’t anything new. When they first got together she was understandable shy. She wasn’t sure if she should put on show for him like a porno or actually get herself off. It didn’t take long for her to discover that, with her, he knew the difference and only wanted the real thing.

She leaned back into the couch and made herself comfortable and took off her silly santa hat. She was about to move her hand down underneath her nice new expensive panties when he grabbed her wrist and brought her hand to his mouth. He took two of her fingers in his mouth and sucked hard. He twirled his tongue around and dragged his teeth over them as he slowly pulled them passed his full lips and out of his mouth.

She watched him slack jawed and transfixed. He knew exactly which buttons to push to completely turn her on. Having him use his teeth on her made her legs tremble and shake.

He looked so smug and satisfied by her reaction. She was about to make fun of him and playfully smack him, but realized that he should feel proud. He knew how to play her body perfectly. She was proud of him too.

“You gunna watch me?” she purred.

“Fuck babe. I’m gunna memorize you. Nights are sooooo fucking long without you.”

She smiled at him and kept her eyes on his face as she moved her thong to the side and ran her fingers over her soft bare pussy. He took a deep shuddering breath and was completely focused on her movements. She could feel the wetness that he had left on her fingers and let out a soft whimpering moan into the dark room.

She closed her eyes and began playing and toying with herself. She was so turned on from before, it wasn’t taking much to get her excited. She sunk her two fingers deep into her cunt and heard something that sounded like a cross between a moan and growl come from the back of Jensen’s throat. Hearing his approval turned her on so powerfully. She used her other hand to run circles over clit.

She was panting softly and fucking herself faster and faster. Jensen ran his hand up and down her thigh as he watched. She felt her release pooling fast in her belly. They could both hear exactly how wet she was.

“So fuckin’ hot. You like that huh? You’re close aren’t you.”

She peeked her eyes open and watched him slowly pumping his cock with his fist as he watched her. His jeans were long gone. She must have been distracted by her own ministrations.  

The lights of the Christmas tree softly lit up his face and his large muscular physique. She couldn’t believe how much she loved him in that moment. He looked like art personified.

“Fuck J.” she moaned.

They way he looked back at her was so intense and sexy she felt like he was looking into her soul.

“Come Q. Come on baby, lemme see you come.”

Her back seemed to arch up off the back of the couch on it’s own accord. Hearing his voice and watching him stroke his thick cock sent her over the edge.

Right before she came, she felt him pull her face towards his mouth. He pressed his soft full lips over hers and muffled her passionate cries. She rode out her orgasm against her hands while he tried to silence her and enjoy her sounds in his own unique way.

He chuckled and plopped down on the couch beside her. He put her santa hat on his head and pulled her onto his lap so that she was straddling him. She was still feeling the warm electric waves of her orgasm as she smiled down at the man she loved. He looked so cute in her hat. She felt like she was glowing. He looked as happy as she felt. He was everything, just looking at him made her skin hum.

He smiled back darkly and took her hand and sucked her fingers clean. She watched him again with the same amazed look on her face as before. It was indescribably hot to watch him enjoy her like that. He moaned in delight and cleaned off the fingers on her other hand. She felt his hard cock twitch against her thigh when she moaned in response.

“Kinky Santa?” she teased and gave him a quick wink.

“You’re delicious. It’s not kinky, it’s a fact. But since you’re already sitting on my lap pretty girl, I really can’t decide if you’ve been naughty or nice …you do both so well.”

“I’d rather be _doing_ you Santa.”

“Is this what you want for Christmas baby?” he lifted his hips and pressed his erection against her.

She bit her bottom lip and nodded her head. She was so close to cracking up but managed to keep a straight face. He always made these intimate sexy times so much fucking fun.

He ran his hands over the lace of her corset. He squeezed her boobs and ran his hands over it again. He started to look puzzled, his roaming hands seemed to be searching for something.

“You don’t know how to get me outta this thing do you?”

“Busted. Help a Santa out?” he puffed out a laugh and hugged her so tight that it made her squeak.

With her straddling him she was in the perfect position. He quickly shoved his face as far into her cleavage as he could get and motorboated her boobs. His beard tickled and she laughed loud. Her squirming was getting uncomfortable so he stood up with her in his arms. He had a better idea.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his narrow waist, careful not to stab him in the back with the pointy heels of her shoes.

He walked her over to the christmas tree in the corner of the room and carefully laid her down on the floor beside it. The colorful lights were romantic and made her seem more beautiful for some reason. His heart was so full just looking at her and knowing that she was his.

He pulled the santa hat off his head and leaned down to kiss her. But she stopped him.

“What? Wait? Why are you losing the hat?”

“I dunno? Really?” he puffed out an incredulous laugh. He thought he was the kinky one in this relationship, but she was always full of surprises.

“It’s cute. You’re my sexy kinky Santa.” she teased and ran her hands up and down the corded muscles along his back.

“I just want…I dunno. I just thought tonight should be…” he steadied his weight on his arm and nervously rubbed the back of his neck with his other hand. “I thought that tonight we should _‘make love’_ or some shit. You know? Make it special. Make it _emotional_ or something.”

She couldn’t help it, a laughter came up bubbling from her toes that she wasn’t sure she could suppress. She covered her mouth with both hands and tried to hide how silly she thought that sounded.

“Great. Nice Quinn.” he smirked and shook his head at her. He did kinda sound like a dumbass.

“I’m sorry. I’m not laughing at you…well maybe a little bit.”

They started play fighting and tickling each other. He won of course, and laid all of his bodyweight on top of her while they calmed down and stopped giggling.

“J. Seriously…”

They were all laughed out and he was using her boobs as a pillow. She was playing with his hair and noticed that it started snowing outside. It made her feel peaceful for some reason.

“…every time that we’ve ever fucked da shit outta each other, we’re still _‘making love’_ ya know.”

“Even that time in my truck? That was pretty hot.”

“Yes that was crazy hot…and a little illegal…”

He chuckled against her chest as he listened to her.

“…but even when we play or when we’re a little rougher, I can always feel how much you love me. Is it the same for you? Can you feel how much I lov-”

“Everytime.” he emphatically cut her off. “Every. Single. Time.”

She smiled above him and kissed the top of his head.

“See? We always _make love_. Don’t take things so seriously. Lets just be us. I like us.”

“I love the shit outta us.”

He started kissing the top of her cleavage and moved his way up towards her neck. She managed to shimming out of her thong and raised her hips up, pushing her wet center towards his cock. Her heart started to beat faster, she couldn’t wait to feel him inside of her.

He flicked his tongue against her neck and entered her to the hilt with a single thrust, pinning her hips back down towards the hardwood floor.

She moaned and enjoyed the feeling of him stretching and filling her with his impressive size. He still had most of his bodyweight on top of her but she loved it. She could tell that he was loving the feeling as well.

He kissed and sucked on her lips while he waited for her to adjust to his size.

“So wet. Holy shit, you feel amazing.” he picked up his speed and started to fuck her with much more of a primal need.

He was taking her quick and she loved it. Every thrust was so determined and deep. She felt like she belonged to him, it was intense and everything that she wanted. He was so vocal, his grunts and moans mixed with her mewls and curses.  

She pulled his face down to hers and kissed behind his ear without breaking his powerful rhythm. Her corset was starting to feel a little uncomfortable. She had no intention of wearing it for this long.

“It’s a front zipper.” she whispered loudly through her moans.

“Oh thank fuck!” he knew exactly what she was talking about and was thankful for the new intel.

He sat up on his knees without separating their bodies and yanked the zipper down. Her breasts spilled out of the cups and he greedily took a nipple into his mouth. She rubbed her clit while he moved from breast to breast sucking and biting on them while he fucked her.

“I’m so close Quinn.” he pressed his forehead against hers as he spoke.

She was so responsive, it was killing him. He wasn’t sure if he could hold off any longer, but wanted to feel her come around his cock first.

“Tell. Me. What.You. Need.” each word was punctuated by a sharp hard thrust.

He was hitting her g spot every time. She stopped rubbing herself and grabbed at his back to try and channel the orasgm he was building inside her.

“Oh shit baby. I’m close. Just fuck me.” she wrapped her legs around his waist and felt him reach even deeper inside her, she was amazed that was even possible.

“You feel so good J. Rub my clit again for me baby.”

He licked his two fingers and snaked his hand between their two bodies and found her sensitive clit just in time. He rubbed her fast and bit down where her shoulder met her neck, knowing her kink would make her come hard.

It worked and they came together. They held on to each other tight and he felt her inner walls pulsate and contract against him.

A few moments went by before he softened and reluctantly rolled off her. It was as if he didn’t want it to be over yet. He kissed her quickly and rubbed his nose against hers.

They laid beside each other on the floor, naked and quiet, and looked up at the tree. Looking up at it from the floor made it look almost magical. He offered his large bicep as a makeshift pillow and she cuddled up next to him. They listened to their breathing normalize and were both lost in their thoughts.

“Maybe this can be a new tradition?” he spoke up towards the Christmas tree and broke the silence.

“What’s that Santa?” she teased.

He forgot he had her hat on and playfully threw it at her.

“This you dork. Us. The kids in bed. The Christmas tree. You wanted us to start our own traditions and shit. This feels like a pretty epic tradition right? This feels like us. ”

“It sure does babe. Maybe you’re not such a grinch afterall huh?”

He was being so thoughtful and sweet. She wished he didn’t have to leave. She was wicked tired but was determined to stay up with him for as long as she could.

“I have something else for you.”

“Give me ten minutes and let me hydrate woman. Then Kinky Santa is alllllll yours again!”

“That’s not what I meant…but good to know. I’ll jump ya in a minute, but I for round two I get to wear the hat.”

———————————-

They helped each other off the floor. He put his jeans back on and she stole his t-shirt and scurried off to their bedroom. She needed to clean up, change into some real clothes and bring out his surprise.

She came back wearing her grey holiday mistletoe “lets make out” t-shirt and cute little pair of red lace boyshort panties. He wasn’t sure which outfit he loved on her more. Her sexy black corset? Or her cute t-shirt sans pants? He loved them both equally. They were both so “her” and he couldn’t get enough. He’s never loved another human being as much as he loved his sexy little dork.

But she was also carrying a small gift wrapped box and gift bag.

“Dude, I feel like an asshole. You’re present isn’t here yet…it’ll get here when I’m gone.”

“Shhh. I don’t care. This is tiny. I thought we could play tonight?”

She looked so earnest and happy. He opened her little gift and found that his little dork had bought him a poker set. Not just any poker set. The cards were vintage pin up girls.

“You likey?”

“Uh huh. I’ll bring ‘em with me in the field. The guys are gunna love ‘em.”

They sat down on the floor in front of the Christmas tree and she watched him fish through the deck of cards. She thought he was just checking out all the sexy little pin up girls but he came to the card he was looking for and held it up to her.

“I swear to christ, this was you like 45 minutes ago.”

He handed her the queen of hearts and sure enough it was a long haired brunette dressed in a corset.

“My alter ego.” she giggled.

He leaned over and kissed her smiling lips.

“I dig her. But I think I’d rather make out with you.”

She kissed him back and ran her hands along his bare chest.

“Shit. That reminds me.” she pulled away and handed him the gift bag.

Inside was a black t-shirt. He barked out a huge laugh when he read what it said.

It said “Who’s your Daddy?’ with an image of Darth Vader on it.

“My alter ego stole your shirt, and as much as I love lookin’ at your hot bod. I didn’t want you to chilly.”

They laughed and drank beer in front of the christmas tree. He refused to turn any of the lights on so she lit some of her christmas candles. The whole room felt cozy and full of love and conquinsdentaly smelled amazing as well.

He taught her how to play “Blind Man’s Bluff” They bet with leftover christmas cookies, sexual favors, and skittles to make it more interesting than the poker chips that came in his set.

He had to pull out his phone to take pictures of his little dork with naked women play cards stuck on her forehead. She was such a good sport.

She was also a fucking card shark and won pretty much every game. He gave up, and opted for a cuddle session on the couch with his girl. They put the movie “Elf” on, but pretty much just watched the snow falling outside or gazed at their christmas tree.

He switched the channel to the one that played a roaring fireplace and they both agreed that if they ever bought a house one day it would be so cool to have the real thing. He loved it when she talked about the future. He marveled at how far they’ve come. Getting her to talk about their future used to be like pulling teeth.

She rested her head in his lap and he couldn’t stop playing with her soft hair and twirling it around his fingers. She was completely relaxed and content.

“Are you okay babe?” she asked as she twisted her body around to feed him some pretzels. “With leaving and all?”

“It sucks. I wish I didn’t have to, but this mission is sorta a big fucking deal.”

“Dangerous?”

She asked him the question before she considered if she really wanted to know the answer.

“A little. Do you wanna know about it? I usually tell you stuff when I get back.”

“Only if you want to tell me.” she pulled up her grandmother blanket so that it was covering both of them.

He always told her about his missions classified or otherwise. He trusted her not to breath a word to anyone and she always took his belief and confidence in her very seriously. Sharing his experiences always seemed to help him sort through the traumas playing out in head.

“It’s ahh.” he rubbed the back of his neck and tried to find the right words. “It’s a human trafficking ring.”

“Holy shit.”

“Yeah, I’ve been trying to hack into them for awhile now, but they have ten guys just like me trying to keep me out.”

“No one is just like you.”

“Damn straight.” he kissed the top of her and decided to tell her the rest of it. “They’re international so this whole mission is off the books. Clay is cutting through all the bureaucratic red tape because these fuckers specialize in kids and women. You’re brother is pretty fuckin’ badass, but don’t tell him I said that.”

“He wouldn’t believe you said it anyway.” she teased and put the bowl of pretzel on the coffee table. She lost her appetite.

“These guys are bad. If there’s a natural disaster somewhere they swoop in…” he shook his head like he was trying to erase his terrible thoughts. “Anyways, I got lucky and we know where they will be unloading a shipment.”

“A shipment of _people?_ ” she swallowed hard and felt her heart sink.

This was Christmas for christ sake, she started to feel sick. All of a sudden her problems didn’t feel so dire anymore.

“Yeah. Sorry babe.” he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her hair. “I didn’t mean to be such a buzzkill.”

“How many people are we talking about?”

“A lot.”

“Like ten?”

He smiled sadly and kissed her hair again. Of course she would think that ten people were a lot. Her heart was so big, one person being enslaved was too many.

“More.”

“A hundred?”

She wasn’t sure if she wanted him to answer her at this point. Her blood started to boil at the thought of all those people suffering.

He didn’t answer her, he didn’t want all of this shit in her head. Instead he held her tighter and smoothed her hair. He hated ruining their night talking about all that terrible shit.

“…that’s dark babe. You go get those mother fuckers.”

“We plan on it.”

“I mean it. Stay safe, but getting those people getting back to their homes and their families…”

She started to choke up and couldn’t finish her thought.

“Come ‘er QBall.”

He pulled her face up to his and kissed her lips and dried her eyes.

“I love you. I wish you didn’t have to go, but you’re going for a good cause. I’m proud of you.”

He gave her his shy smile and looked away from her.

“Hey. I mean it.”

“I know you do.” he was uncomfortable talking about himself. He’s been known to brag, that’s no secret. But bragging about this, or his job made him feel gross. “It’s late do you wanna get some rest?”

“Nope.” she answered with a yawn.

She was fighting sleep but knew that if she closed her eyes she would wake up and he would be gone. But on the other hand, now that she knew the nature of his mission there was a part of her that wanted to push him out the door to go help those people.

“What do you wanna do? Do you have all your stuff ready?”

“Yeah Cougar loaded up all my equipment for me already. He wanted us to have some time to chill with the boys before we shipped out.”

“That was cool of him. I’ll bring the kids over to see his mom while you’re gone. Make sure she doesn’t spend the holidays alone.”

Mrs. Alvarez was the most popular person in her retirement home. She was sure that she would be fine but wanted to visit her anyway. She made a mental note to check on Jolene as well.

“By the way, Annie is going to stop by in the morning before her shift and drop off my present.”

“Sweet…”

She felt her eyes getting heavier and sat up quickly and checked her watch.

“It’s almost one. Wanna take a shower?”

————————

They kissed and held each other close under the spray of the water. Their tongues caressed and explored each other’s mouths while their hands languidly ran over their bodies. They were alone in their own little world. Drops of hot water mixing with the taste of each other in their mouths.

The way that they touched each other was relaxed and slow, truly savoring each other. Building their passion at their own pace.  

He eventually pressed her against the wall and focused his attention on the rest of her body. He kneaded her breasts till she arched her back and pressed her breasts into his hands. His mouth travel down her body till he reached her core. He kissed and dragged his tongue across her c section scar and buried his face against her pussy and breathed deeply. He groaned in delight and kissed her folds lovingly like they were her mouth.

He kissed along her thighs and she ran her hands through his wet hair. He was taking his time and loving her whole body. She felt his mouth and tongue licking and sucking the droplets of water running down her body.

His face finally came back to cunt and he spread her lips open with his fingers. He very skillfully brought her clit out from it’s hood and wasted no time alternating between sucking and licking it over and over again. His full lips kissed and explored every inch of her and truly worshipping everything in their path.

He made her knees go weak with his ministrations. He took her leg and hooked it over his shoulder to steady her. She pulled on his hair and brought his face back to her. He ate her with complete abandon and shook his face from side to side.

“Don’t stop Jake. Please don’t stop.”

He had no intention of stopping. Hearing her call out excited him and caused him to increase his efforts. He used a series of enthusiastic broad strokes with his tongue knowing it would make her moan louder.

He added two fingers inside her and raked them over her gspot over and over again.

“I’m coming.”

She didn’t need to say anything, he knew. He held her close as she came hard against face. He licked and sucked on her throughout.

“ _Hmmm_.” she hummed and looked down at him between her legs. “The water is running cold.”

“Oh I see how it is.” he looked up and gave her a devilish smirk. “I was waiting for _‘oh baby you’re tongue is amazing, I think I saw god.’_ ”  he tried his best use his most feminine soprano voice in a humorous attempt to mimic hers.

“All that is true my love, but I’m starting to get pruney.” she giggled and carded her fingers through his short blonde hair.

He puffed out a laugh and lapped at her pussy a few more times before turning the water off.

She wrapped a towel around her body and grabbed a second and started to dry him off. She caught his sweet smile in the bathroom mirror and reached around him to hold and slowly stroke his rather large erection. She studied his expression in the mirror and delighted in his bliss.

“Come on baby. I want you in my mouth.” she motioned to the bedroom and grabbed the santa hat off the counter.

————————

The rest of the night was filled with slowing loving sex and playfully naked wrestling. They couldn’t keep their hands (or mouths) off each other.

They would laugh and talk, then fuck. Sometimes have full conversations while they were fucking. Then start bicker over who’s turn it was to run to the kitchen naked and grab them fresh bottled of water to rehydrate.

He tried to convince her that she should still go out with her friends on New Year’s Eve without him, but could tell that she didn’t look too sold on the idea. He jumped out of bed and found the nail polish that she had bought to match her dress and forced her with the threat of a tickle attack to let him paint her toenails.

He didn’t do a bad job. She was impressed, but not impressed enough to go out and party without him but she promised to think about it.

They rolled around in bed and tried to make each other laugh through till the early hours of the morning.

Jensen finally got dressed at around 5am. Quinn was naked and passed out face first on their bed. She was finally sleeping soundly after he spent over twenty minutes rubbing and massaging her back and shoulders. It took all of his self control to not to slip his hands between her legs and give her a happy ending. Her skin was so soft and smooth, he’d go lower and lower and softly knead her ass cheeks.

All the while she moaned and mewed ever so softly under his touch. He was more than turned on by the experience. But he knew that she was exhausted and stubborn. She was determined to stay up with him all night but he wanted to her get some rest before he had to leave. For as willing as he was to get her off again, he knew that her sleep patterns got all fucked up when he was away.

So when she relaxed and seemed to fall asleep he did his best not to wake her. He took another look at his handy work and made a mental note to paint her nails more often. It was kinda fun, especially if his girl was naked while he was doing it.

He was still awake so he went to go check in on the boys before his sister got there. She couldn’t stay long. She had an early shift at the hospital. He had no idea what she could have gotten him for Christmas that couldn’t wait till he got back.

The kids were adorable as always and sleeping just as soundly as their mom. He watched them sleep for while and counted his blessing.

————————————————-  

He must have dozed off because he woke with the sound of someone knocking on their front door. The dogs weren’t barking but he could hear them jumping and scratching at the door. It was only a matter of time before they lost their shit and woke the whole house up.

“Hey Ann.” he swung open the door and greeted his little sister with a hug.

She hugged him back and handed him a coffee.

“What the hell is all this?” he was shocked at the size of the box sitting beside her. “Did you carry this in yourself? Dude you shoulda texted me.”

“I did dumbass.” she smacked his arm for not responding to the three texts she sent from the van.

“Easy Slugger. I fell asleep in the boys room, so sue me. I didn’t know you were going to try and carry something the size of a big beer fridge in by yourself.”

“It’s not that heavy. Go ahead and open it, I can’t stay long.”

He picked it up off the hallway floor and sure enough it wasn’t all that heavy. But it was so big he had a hard time getting it through the door.

He looked at Annie expectantly and she just motioned to the box with her chin and drank her coffee.

He took that as a green light and torn off the paper.

“You got me a sled! DUDE! You got me a fucking sled! This is _soooo_ cool!”

“I got you a SnowRacer dude, get with the program.”

“Sorry. I love my fucking SnowRacer. Did Quinn tell you that we got two smaller ones for the kids?”

“She _might_ have mentioned it…and I might have also bought me, Lyssa and Quinn matching pink ones too. Now all the members of Team Jensen are going to be tricked out on the hill this year….you better come home safe J cause we’re hittin’ the hill again once you’re home.”

Her voice took a more serious tone and he pulled her into another hug.

Sledding on Christmas Eve was always their thing and he was going to miss it this year. Quinn was already planning on taking the boys even without him, but he wished that he could be there to see his family having fun.

“You’re on Slugger.” he kissed her hair and squeezed her tight.

“Be careful Jake.”

“Sure thing. Look in on them for me k.” he tried not to get too choked up as he asked her.

 “Already planning on it big brother. They’re in good hands. I gotta get to work.”

He felt her wave at something behind him. He swung around with his sister in his arms and spotted Quinn coming into the living room dressed in his huge Pats hoodie and her yoga leggings.

“Mornin’ Q. I’ll swing by again after work and pick the boys up for their playdate. I gotta jet.”

“Bye Sweetie.”

Quinn hugged her and showed her out while Jensen showed off his new tricked out sled.

“I woke up and you were gone.”

“I just wanted to let you sleep a little babe. I would never leave without saying goodbye. That would be a dick move.”

“You tricked me with your epic back rubs.”

“Busted. But I’m not even sorry, you looked adorable.”

She puffed out a small laugh as he kissed her forehead and pulled her into a hug. Pooch and Cougar were going to be there any minute to pick him up. His bag was ready to go, he was just waiting for their text.

“Kick ass. Stay safe. And come home in one piece baby.”

He nodded his head and tucked her hair behind her ears.

“You know, Christmas used to remind me of everything I didn’t have. Now I have everything and that’s all because of you babe.”

She smiled sweetly at him while warm tears began to fall down her cheeks.

“Before you, I thought I had everything because I had my boys. They were my family and I didn’t think I needed anyone else. But being with you makes me feel more alive than I ever thought possible. You’re my best friend Jake. I love that it’s our family now and not just mine.”

She was going to make him cry. He tried to stay strong and swallowed down the hard lump in his throat. Leaving what the two of them have built together was getting harder and harder.

He wiped away her tears the best he could when he heard another knock at the door.

He left Quinn to finish wiping her tears with the long sleeves of his hoodie and was surprised to see Clay on the other side of the door.

“Colonel.”

“Jensen.” they greeted each other with familiar nods. “The rest of the men are out front. Is Quinn up?”

“Hey old man.” she wrapped her arm around Jensen’s waist and smiled at her big brother.

“Hey kid.” he gave her his big warm Franklin Clay smile and she ushered him through the door.

Jensen kissed her temple and left to grab his things.

“Remember Thanksgiving when you gave me Dad’s old pipe?”

“Yuss, and no you can’t teach the boys how to smoke it, so don’t ask.” she teased.

He puffed out a deep laugh and handed her a small box.

“Merry Christmas kid.”

Inside was a small old velvet jewelry box. She knew what it was and new tears began to fall down her cheeks. She ran her fingertips over the worn velvet and was flooded with childhood memories.

“Don’t cry Q. I wasn’t sure if I still had them. I didn’t want to say anything at Thanksgiving in case I couldn’t find them.”

She gave him an understanding smile and took a deep breath before she opened the small box. Inside were her grandmother Rosalie’s small diamond stud earrings.

“But you’re the oldest though…I thought she left them to you?”

“She did. But it’s not like they go with my outfit. They should have gone to you Quinn. I should have given them to you years ago, I really did think I’d lost them. Better you have them.”

Their Grandmother Rosalie left Quinn the majority of her modest estate, leaving only a few expensive treasured items to her brother. Their grandmother always hoped that one day he would find the right girl and pass them down to his wife.

“Don’t leave yet! I have something for you too.”

She sailed passed Jensen in the hall as she ran to her room. He was coming out of the boys room after saying his final goodbyes and had no idea why she was running around like a crazy person, but went with it and got out of her way. She came out with a large shopping bag from a custom framing store.

“Great minds think alike old man.”

“Did you get me earrings too, you shouldn’t have.” he teased dryly.

Jensen had to do a double take. It was odd watching his boss act like a real human being with a sense of humor. He smiled proudly at Quinn, she tended to bring out the best in people.

Clay pulled the large frame from the bag and studied it careful. She held her breath and waited for his reaction.

After a moment passed she let out the breath she was holding when a big smile stretch across his face.

“Well ho-ly shit.” he puffed out a loud laugh and shook his head. “Are these all of them?”

“All of what?” Jensen was all ready to go but was very curious as to why his boss was low key freaking out in his livingroom.

“I think so. I had them all restored and polished. I just got it back from the framer a couple of days ago.”

“They’re our Dad’s medals.” Clay turned the frame around so that Jensen could take a look. “He hated them but Mom wouldn’t let him throw them out after he retired.”

Jensen knew that their Dad was in the military but had no idea he was so decorated. Clay thanked his little sister and kissed her on the top of her head.

“We gotta get goin’ kiddo. Tell the kids I said Merry Christmas. Mallory is dropping off all their presents before she leaves for Cabo with her mom.”

“Stay safe and good luck. I love you old man.”

He hugged her again and left his present with her for safekeeping. Before he left he gave Jensen a knowing nod and left them alone to say their goodbyes.

“I love you.”

“I love you too QBall. I’ll try and send word to you somehow and let you know when I’ll be back. Please try and have fun on New Year’s Eve if I can’t make it. Okay?”

He looked so worried about her, it made her worry more about him.

“Don’t think about us okay? Stay focused on your game.” she tried to sound serious and stern.

He stood up a little straighter and immediately looked like a solider.

“I’m your little badass remember? I have everything under control here. The only thing I want you worried about is your job. Ok?”

“Promise…I gotta go Quinn.”

He kissed her again and it hurt like hell to have to stop. He could barely look at her as he left.

She closed the door behind him and let all the pent up tears she had been trying to suppress fall down her face.

After a few minutes of her quietly sobbing against the door she heard her phone go off on the coffee table and went to answer it.

**Jensen** : U know UR kinda hot when UR giving orders did ya know that?

**Quinn** : Now U see why I find it so hot when U do it huh? xo LOL

**Jensen:** Thanks for making last night so cool, I kinda loved it. It was like our own mini holiday.

**Quinn** : Merry Christmas Jensen. I love you xo

**Jensen:** I love you too. Merry Christmas QBall. xo


	4. "The Yoga Instructor Who Saved Christmas"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quinn tries her best to celebrate the holidays without Jensen. She ends up making a new friend in the process.

[ ](http://heather-lynn.tumblr.com/post/156461227023/home-is-where-the-heart-ispart-1-part-2)

 

 

It had been five days since Jensen had left. Quinn was doing her best at trying to keep herself and the boys busy but as usual, Jensen’s absence were hard on all of them.

She couldn’t sleep and eventually gave up trying to get comfortable and stared up at the ceiling. Besides the dogs snoring in their dog bed, the condo felt way too quiet. She missed the sound of Jensen sleeping next to her. She grabbed his unused pillow and hugged it close.

What she wouldn’t give to feel his large arms wrapped around her right now. She knew that wherever in the world he was resting his head that night, he was thinking of her, too. He’d probably be pissed off that she was so worried about him. She just hoped that he was safe. If anything ever happened to him, she didn’t think she’d be able to bear it.

She took a deep breath and gave herself a little pep talk before she ended up crying herself to sleep.

 _“He’s okay. I can do this.”_ she silently told herself over and over again until the urge to cry seemingly faded. His pillow still smelled like the product he used in his hair, it made her heart ache.

Her plan was to purposely filled her days with extra work and errands so feelings like this wouldn’t consume her at night. If she was exhausted, then she barely had time to think about her boyfriend and her brother and consider all the dangerous situations that the team could be in. She would pass out as soon as her head hit the pillow.

Jensen would be so proud of how productive she’s been as long as he didn’t know the reason why.

But during this deployment it wasn’t enough. Knowing that Christmas was two days way and she would have celebrate without Jensen was harder than she anticipated.

Annie had been great. She’d popped by the house before and after every shift to see if Quinn was okay or needed anything. The boys lit up every time they saw her. Quinn loved Jensen’s little sister and had started to think of Annie as her sister as well. Quinn had a feeling that maybe Jensen had asked Annie to look in on them, but loved her for it all the same.

Mallory was pretty wonderful, too, and helped fill Quinn’s days. Her friend never talked about how she felt about Clay being away, though. It didn’t matter how many times Quinn asked if she was okay, she always got the same “I’m fine,” answer. It took awhile for Quinn to catch on the fact that looking after her was Mallory’s way of coping.

She considered herself so lucky to have woman like them in her life. She wished she could give them back some of the comfort she gave her, but at the moment she could barely look after herself and the boys.

Other than Quinn’s depression, the only noteworthy thing that happened since Jensen left was the girls deciding to try out a new yoga class. Quinn hoped that maybe it would help her feel more centered and balance her emotions.

Plus she had a feeling that Mallory and Annie were teaming up and conspiring together to get her there. Her friends were worried about her; hell she was worried about herself, too. She hated that she didn’t feel like herself.

Their new yoga instructor, Sammie, was a piece of work and, unfortunately, bore the brunt of Quinn’s foul mood.

Quinn was usually a girl’s girl, but not this time. Sammie was close to her age and annoyingly perfect. She always had a happy smile on her face and it drove Quinn crazy. It wasn’t a fake smile, either, it was beautiful, just like the rest of her.  Every single one of her poses was perfect elegance. It made Quinn feel clumsy and awkward like she was wearing a huge pair of clown shoes. She decided, out of spite, that she was going to hate the woman.

With everything that she was going through, it was almost impossible for her to focus and keep up with her class. She wondered what Sammie’s day job must be every time she chastised her for chatting and giggling with the girls when they should have been paying attention. Truth was Quinn was being a disruptive little shit, even Mallory told her to chill out from time to time.

She figured that Sammie must be some kind of teacher, but never stuck around long enough after class to find out. She didn’t want to be her friend or give her a chance to try and cheer her up. Sammie came over a few times to introduce herself and Quinn rudely ducked out of the studio and pretended like she didn’t see her.

Quinn gave in to her snarky mood and decided that Sammie took the whole class way too seriously and she was going to quit as soon as she could get away with it. The truth was her new instructor made her feel inadequate. Sammie was so positive and warm compared to Quinn’s dark and gloomy mood. She was simply jealous. She missed being the positive and warm one and needed somewhere to channel her dark thoughts.

Keeping busy during the day with the girls would usually buy her some time before her nights were inevitably plagued by anxiety. But she couldn’t keep up that pace forever, she was only human.

Quinn pulled up the neck of her t-shirt up and breathed deeply, trying to possibly smell some trace of Jensen on his old shirt. It was faint, but she could still make out a tiny whiff of his cologne. She closed her eyes and tried to clear her mind, but all she could see was his sweet dorky face. She had to believe that he was okay and that she would see him again. Her body felt so tired, but her brain wouldn’t turn itself off long enough to sleep.

Her bed felt gigantic and cold without him there beside her. She buried her face in his pillow out of frustration, but couldn’t get the last day they had together out of her head. All she could think about were those damn NERF crossbows and how excited Jensen had been to buy them for the boys.

She replayed the last morning they had together Christmas shopping in her mind over and over again. Every time she thought about it, all she could see was the pure love and devotion he had for the boys written all over his face.

Her heart was filled with so much regret. She had made him put the crossbows back. Why had she done that? He had been so disappointed. Remembering the sad look on his face gutted her hour after hour as she tossed and turned in their big empty bed.

They were going to raise Cooper and Jackson together. There was no way their kids were going to be anything like her ex husband Ryan. They weren’t spoiled, they were loved. She shouldn’t have been such a hardass.

She vowed to go to the store in the morning and buy them to appease her conscience. Tomorrow was Christmas Eve, she still had time, right?

She texted Mallory and asked if she could watch the boys before her flight to Cabo.

Maybe righting that wrong would give her some peace.

—————————————————–

Of course, the department store was a mad house, the next morning. She expected nothing less on the day before Christmas, but Quinn was on a mission. She navigated through the hoards of holiday shoppers trying to get the toy section at the back of the store.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw her new yoga instructor, Sammie, shopping with her husband and cringed. What were the odds? A friendly, chipper, well-meaning conservation about the proper form of her downward-facing dog was not something Quinn had the patience for, at the moment.

She thought she was making good time until she stumbled and walked straight into a large tall man and knocked all the air out her lungs. She felt his hands grab her before she hit the floor. It all happened so fast, once she realized what an ass she had been a deep blush started to burn on her cheeks.

“Whoa there!” the stranger laughed and set her on her feet.

“I am so so sorry! I wasn’t lo-”

Quinn looked up and the tall stranger wasn’t a stranger afterall. It was James Thompson, Chloe’s husband. They both smiled apologetically once they recognized each other.

“You weren’t looking were you? Why am I not surprised?” Chloe came out of nowhere and interjected.

Chloe was the head coach of the Petunias and not one of Quinn’s biggest fans. Unfortunately, if Quinn wanted to keep her assistant coaching position on her niece’s soccer team, Chloe was an unfortunate evil that she had to put up.

There wasn’t much that Quinn wouldn’t do for Alyssa. That little girl meant everything to her. But she deserved a medal for putting up with that woman’s attitude. She had no idea what Chloe’s problem was with her and Jensen, but didn’t have time figure it all out in the middle of the store.

“Chloe.” Quinn pressed her lips together and gave her a small nod.

She was so embarrassed by her clumsiness. She looked down at the floor, but could feel Chloe smirking and shaking her head at her.

“This is Christmas, _Quinn._ ” the spiteful way she said her name made Quinn cringe. “Watch where you’re going. Maybe it doesn’t matter that much to you, but I for one don’t feel like spending the holidays in the emergency room with _my_ husband.”

James seemed to shrink and shy away. Quinn gave him a small sweet smile and understood. Chloe was a bit much to handle, but at least she didn’t have to live with her. He slowly pivoted on his heel and took off towards the toy aisle and out of harm’s way.  

Out of the corner of her eye, Quinn could see Sammie and her husband looking at toys and pretending not to over hear her being chastised by an angry, petite, blonde hellhound. Quinn was mortified; she was quitting that yoga class for sure now.

“I mean, seriously. What’s your problem? I thought you and Alyssa’s loud obnoxious Uncle were shacking up and here you are on Christmas Eve throwing yourself at _married_ men.”

“Throwing myself? Oh, come on, It was an accident, Chloe.” Quinn remembered Jensen telling her that Chloe had grabbed his butt on Halloween while he had been dressed as Captain America. The nerve of this woman thinking that she was hitting on James. “Look, I don’t have time for this.”

“Yes, Miss _‘My Time is More Important Than Yours’,_ I don’t care how many books you sell or how many book tours you go on. You’re not all that, sweetheart.”

“That’s not what I meant. I apologized to James. I’m sorry, it won’t happen again. I just came here for one thing and I’ll get out of your way.”

Quinn was about to take off when James came bouncing back to his angry wife with two NERF crossbows in his hand looking as happy as could be. The mirror opposite of his wife.

“Oh my god! James! Where did you find those!” Quinn’s eyes were huge and she nearly jumped out of her skin. These were the exact ones that Jensen had wanted to buy for the boys.

“Sorry, Quinn. These were the last ones. Did you want them?”

“NO. She didn’t!” Chloe grabbed them from her husband’s hands and threw them into her shopping cart.

“Please, Chloe. I need those. Those are the only reason I came here. It’s Christmas, they were supposed to be from Jensen.”

Quinn was on the verge of a complete meltdown. She was trying so hard to keep her composure, but Chloe’s cruel cold stare was making her feel two feet tall.

“Jensen? What? He can’t do his own Christmas shopping? He sends _you_ to do it? No wonder you’re hitting on any man you can get your hands on.”

Quinn started to tremble and sucked on her bottom lip. She wasn’t sure what was more devastating, the humiliation of getting yelled at in public or being so emotionally exhausted that she couldn’t find the words to fight back and stand up for herself.

“Look around, it’s Christmas Eve. Is this really how much he thinks of being a father? Waiting until Christmas Eve to shop for his kids? …well I guess he is just a _step father._ Not exactly the same thing now is it?”

Tears started to fall down Quinn’s cheeks, but she quickly wiped them away. She noticed Sammie’s husband pull his wife back to keep her from interjecting. She took a deep breath and tried to stop her tears. She couldn’t believe this was happening.

James just stood there looking defeated. He almost reached out to comfort her, but Chloe shot him a deadly look and he stopped himself.

“He’s not in town. He can’t buy them himself. He’s missing Christmas with us this year.”

“Ha! See! This is what I mean.” Chloe flipped her blonde hair over her shoulder and looked triumphant. She leaned in to give her advice. Quinn shook with rage and tried not to slap her.

“Quinn really? I’m surprised. Shocked really. How in the world do you put up with that man? I mean the hair and the glasses are one thing, but leaving you and the boys at Christmas? Is that all you mean to him? I know he’s kinda buff and all, and I thought he followed you around like a puppy but…” she shook her head and seemed delighted at the chance to pity her. “You really should have more respect for yourself and your kids. I would think a hot shot like you would be able to do a little better for yourself.”

Quinn squared her shoulders and stood up straighter. She had reached the limit on her patience. She swallowed hard and almost gagged on the smell of Chloe’s strong perfume.

“He’s not here because he’s in the military, you dumb bitch.” Quinn barely raised her shaky voice. “He’s deployed and risking his life while you stand here and trash him.”

Chloe was stunned and offended by the name calling and put her hand over her heart.

“Why I never!”

“I strongly doubt this is the first time you’ve been called a dumb bitch…what with you being a dumb bitch and all. Merry Christmas. Maybe Santa will get you a better dye job. You’re roots are showing.”

Quinn heard her new yoga instructor bark out a loud laugh followed by her husband shushing her and pulling her away.

———————————————————————

Quinn was proud of herself for making it to the car before she broke out into full ugly crying sobs.

They were just toys, she kept telling herself. Silly plastic toys that really didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. But she wanted to give them to the boys so badly. Even though they already had so many other presents to open, she somehow thought that if she could give those crossbows to the boys on Christmas morning then a part of their dad would be there with them.

She sat in the driver’s seat and felt like a failure. It was too late to look for another set anywhere else. Mallory couldn’t watch the boys forever, she had a plane to catch, after all. Quinn buried her face into her hands and let herself cry close to a week’s worth of tears. No more holding it all in. A minute or two had gone by when she heard someone knocking on her window.

Quinn looked up and saw her very well-meaning yoga instructor looking in on her. Quinn sniffed then did her best to collect herself and wipe away her tears. When would this day of embarrassments be over?

“Hi.” she rolled down her window and the two women exchanged pleasant smiles.

“Quinn, right? I wasn’t sure how you took your coffee so I got you the most Christmasy one on the menu.” she handed her a venti Starbucks cup through the window.

Quinn was so touched by the gesture. She didn’t know what to say.

“Thank you. Sammie?”

“Yup, that’s me. You’ve taken my class a few times this week with your girlfriends.”

Quinn started to feel like she was being rude and opened to the car door to get out to speak to Sammie properly, it was the least she could do. She was being so nice and sincere, there was something about her made Quinn start to feel a little better.

“Yes. Annie and Mallory. You’re a great teacher…you really…you really know your stuff!”  

That was the understatement of the year. Quinn started to feel awkward. She was pretty sure that Sammie had witness most, if not all, of the ugly scene back in the department store and here they were chatting like nothing had happened over peppermint flavoured coffee in the parking lot. Not to mention the fact that Quinn was also pretty sure that evidence of her meltdown was still written all over her tear stained face.

“Thanks. I love teaching and I love yoga. Why not combine the two!”

“You’re a teacher?” Quinn gave her a tight smile and started to feel bad about all the teacher jokes she made behind her back.

The woman began talking about their jobs and their families and smiled sweetly at each other while they enjoyed their coffees. They were both mothers to two little kids, they had more in common then Quinn thought. Several minutes passed before Sammie’s husband came jogging up to them carrying a large handful of shopping bags.

“Quinn, this is Chris. Chris, this is Quinn. She takes my yoga class.”

“Hi. Look, I’m sorry about all that back there.” Quinn apologized to both of them, addressing the elephant in the room.

She had calmed down considerably thanks to Sammie and the warm coffee. But she felt ashamed of the way she acted back in the store. Chloe deserved it, but it wasn’t her finest moment.

“Hey! Don’t you worry about it.” Chris assured her. “That chick was… she was… _whoa!_ I had to keep pulling this one back.” Chris playfully motioned to his wife. “I was sure Sammie here was going to end up knocking her out. But, I didn’t have enough cash on me to bail her out of jail _annnnd_ …” he smiled adorably at his wife and handed Quinn one of his many shopping bags. “Bribe that crazy lady for these bad boys.”

Quinn was stunned. Inside the shopping bag were the last two NERF crossbows.

She didn’t know what to say. She just stared back and forth from Sammie to Chris back to the bag. Over and over again. She opened her mouth to thank them, but couldn’t seem to form words.

“I don’t…I don’t know what to say. How?”

“Chris just layed on a little of the Evans charm.” Sammie nudged him in the side with her elbow.

“It helped that I’m an actor by trade, because between you, me and the Starbucks, I couldn’t stand that girl. But a few autographs and a couple selfies later and she handed them over.”

Quinn almost told him about Chloe’s “affection” for Captain America, but was still too overwhelmed to speak.

“Don’t be too impressed with your celeb status, babe. We also offered her three times what they were worth.” Sammie added with a chuckle.

“Thank you so much. This means so much to me.”

Quinn went to grab her wallet to pay them back, but they motioned for her to stop. They didn’t want her money. She started to get choked up at the couple’s generosity.

“It was the least we could do. We couldn’t help but overhear about your husband.” Sammie reached out and sympathetically rubbed her arm.

“Boyfriend.” Quinn corrected her and wiped away her fresh tears.

“Sorry. Your boyfriend. We really hope that he comes home safely and that you and your children have a great Christmas, all things considered.”

Sammie was being so warm and sincere. The exact opposite of the way Quinn had treated her during the short time she’s known her. She felt like such an ass.

“I can’t believe I didn’t like you!” Quinn blurted out without thinking.

Chris barked out the loudest laugh and grabbed his chest. He nearly fell over, he was laughing so hard. He dropped a few shopping bags in the process.

Sammies face fell in disappointment and Quinn kicked herself for being so stupid and careless with her words.

“That was dumb. I’m so dumb. It was just a first impression.” Sammie looked down at her feet. “It wasn’t you, I just didn’t _want_ to like you…” Fuck she wasn’t making the situation any better.

Sammie shot her husband a look and he tried to stop laughing at the situation.

“It’s just… with Jake being away, emotionally I’ve been all over the place. You seemed perfect and happy and I felt so clumsy and depressed. But you’ve been nothing but kind to me. I’m so sorry. You’re so nice, I was being ridiculous.”

“I’ve had my struggles with depression as well. I know how hard it can be.”

Of course, Sammie knew the right thing to say and graciously accepted her apology. Chris lovingly rubbed his wife’s back. Seeing how close and supportive the two of them were made Quinn miss Jensen even more.

“I mean it. Thank you so much. You really did ‘save Christmas!’”

“Well superheros kinda run in our family, huh?”

Chris lovingly rubbed Sammies tummy and Quinn congratulated her on her third pregnancy. It was early on and Sammie wasn’t really showing but they were beaming with excitement nonetheless.

Quinn was so excited for them, she had no idea. They explained that they already had a little boy and girl and were secretly hoping they had a second boy. Quinn agreed that brothers were simply the best and joked that they’ll need a set of crossbows themselves one day.

The two women exchanged numbers and made plans to go out for coffee after the holidays. As Quinn drove home, she couldn’t help, but hope that she had made a real friend. Sammie saw her at her worst and still seemed to want to know her. She considered herself very lucky that she met her.

As soon as she pulled up to her building she took out her phone and made an appointment with her therapist. She should have done that days ago. Maybe if she had, she wouldn’t have been so cold to Sammie in the first place.

————————————

Later that night, she honored Jensen family tradition and took Cooper and Jackson sledding with Annie and Alyssa. John actually made it this time and it was nice to see him playing with the three kids. It was bittersweet to take part in the only holiday tradition that Annie and Jensen had without him there. But they made the most of it.

The kids loved their new snow racers and challenged each other to race after race. Quinn wiped out a few times, but the snow was soft and the kids thought it was hilarious. She and Alyssa crashed a few times on purpose just to make the boys laugh.

“I know I’m not the Jensen that you want, but I’m the Jensen you’re stuck with.” Annie joked as she wrapped her arm around Quinn’s shoulder and pressed her head against hers.

“Meh. You’ll do.” Quinn smiled and volleyed back.

Annie stayed by Quinn’s side most of the evening and did her best to make sure that she had a good time. Quinn told her about her run in with Chloe that morning at the department store. Annie assured her that she would smooth things over and that there would be a mutiny if Chloe ever tried to fire her from the team.

“HEY AUNTIE Q!”

The two girls narrowly ducked out of way before they were pelted with a barrage of snowballs. Their kids had banded together in a kid vs adult snowball fight. Jensen would have been proud.

Many pictures were taken and laughs and hot chocolate were shared. They all felt like a family, it was an experience that Quinn would never forget.

Even though Jensen wasn’t there with them, he was never far from her thoughts. She couldn’t help, but look at Annie and Alyssa’s happy faces and be so thankful that she had met him. Because of him, Cooper and Jackson have an aunt and a cousin that they adore. Not only that but, she gets to be an aunt to Alyssa and have a sister. She knew that Jensen never feels like he gives them enough, but he has given them everything that truly matters: family.

Christmas day went by in the flurry of excited squealing and a mountain of wrapping paper. They all took turns videotaping little messages to Jensen. Jack told his Dad him how much he loved and missed him. It pulled on Quinn’s heartstrings and made her cry happy tears. Jackson has such a true and honest heart. If you had the good fortune to be loved by him, you believed him wholeheartedly when he told you.

Cooper took her phone and made sure that everything was recorded for him so he wouldn’t miss a single detail of the day. He was her responsible little man. He held her phone so carefully and recorded her opening her present from Jensen.

He had ordered her a custom painted Kitchenaid stand mixer. She almost cried. He knew her so well.

The coveted crossbows were a big success. The boys loved them. The poor dogs accidentally got hit more than once before Quinn sent the boys to their room to play.

She was cleaning up the living room and getting ready to visit Cougars mom, when she heard a message alert.

 **Jensen:** Merry Christmas QBall! I had to encrypt this message 13 different ways, but I hope it gets to you on Christmas. I’m sorry I can’t be there with you guys. I wish I could see your cute little face. I miss you so much. Tell the boys I love them and I’ll be home soon. Maybe even for New Years, but no promises. Love you Q.

P.S. tell Jolene and Mallory hey too from the guys but make it sound nicer haha.

She sank down onto the couch and reread his message over and over again. She has never heard from him when he was on a mission. It’s usually not safe. She was very impressed that he found a way to reach her.

She put her feet up on the coffee table and took a look at her toes. The impromptu pedicure he’d given her before he left had been a strange source of comfort for her ever since. It reminded her of their last night together. Silly boy thought that it would last until New Year’s Eve.

After opening presents, they made their rounds on Christmas day. They visited Cougar’s mother Maria and then popped in to say a quick “Merry Christmas” to Jolene. What was supposed to be a quick visit had turned into an invitation to spend Christmas dinner with Jolene and her side of the family. They had a great time and the two women commiserated over Pooch and Jensen’s absence.

And just like that, the holiday was over. Quinn and the boys survived. Ever since Jensen’s text message, sleeping had been a little easier, but she still lived in his clothes.

Charlie and Zach texted her about twice a day with new pictures of her goddaughter Zoe. Charlie offered to make the trip up to see her and Quinn almost let him. Baby Zoe cuddles were always welcome, but she was feeling stronger and didn’t want him to go to so much trouble. Traveling with children isn’t easy.

For New Year’s Eve, she had offers from Annie, Jolene, and even a few texts from Sammie who kindly checked up on her throughout the last week. But Quinn had politely turned them all down. She joked that she had a date with two of the cutest boys in town.

She left the fancy new dress she’d bought weeks ago in her closet and opted for yoga leggings and Jensen’s large Patriots hoodie. Wearing his clothes always made her feel closer to him while he was away.

After an early mock countdown and sparkling cider with the boys, Quinn tucked them in and wished her little men a Happy New Year’s. It was her turn to “party.” Instead of going to bed herself, she headed to the couch with her book and a huge bowl of popcorn and planned on watching the ball drop on tv. She hoped that wherever Jensen was, he was able to celebrate with the rest of the team.

She must have dozed off at some point. She wasn’t sure what time it was when she felt the weight of the couch shift and a hand softly brushing her hair off her cheek.

“Happy New Year. I’m _hooooome_ , sleepyhead.” Jensen softly cooed

Her eyes fluttered open hearing his happy deep voice.

“Are you really here?” she breathless asked. She felt like she was still dreaming.

Her eyes focused on his smiling face looking down at her. He grinned and took her hand and played with her fingers. The dogs noticed that their dad was home and started jumped against his leg.

“I’m really here, you dork.” he teased and brought her hand to his lips and kissed her palm.

Her heart started to beat faster and she pulled his face to her lips and kissed him hard. Her book and bowl of popcorn fell to the ground as they both smiled through their kiss.

He was here. This was real. She was so happy.

She couldn’t pull him close enough to her. He laughed against her lips and managed to kick off his shoes and lay down on top of her.

“Are you okay? Did it go well?” she mumbled into his mouth.

He groaned and nodded his head. His was fine, his sole focus was on kissing her. He has fantasized about her lips for two long weeks, he could barely control himself.

He pulled on her full bottom lip and flicked his tongue against the corner of her mouth. She tasted better then he remembered. He still couldn’t believe that he gets to come home to this woman, he must have been some kind of saint in a past life.

Even two week’s worth of adrenaline could never make him feel that way that she could. His hands were everywhere. He squeezed her breasts and cupped her center over her leggings then held her face as he deepened their kiss. He couldn’t decide what he want parts of her he wanted to touch, he missed all of her so much.

Her hands found their way under his t-shirt and she ran her nails softly down his back. This excited him further and he groaned and dove for the side of her neck. He kissed and sucked on her skin so forcefully she was sure he was going to leave a mark, but she moaned and encouraged him to continue.

She missed the way he tasted and the way he made her feel with his touch. She felt like fireworks were exploding through her veins. She had been sleeping soundly not two minutes earlier, now she felt so alive. He had lit a fire inside her. He was the only person that could make her feel this way.

He pulled his stolen sweatshirt up to her chin and was very pleased to discover that she was not wearing a bra. He went from breast to breast, kissing and sucking on her nipples while she struggled to remove the rest of the sweatshirt over her head. She writhed against him and ran her fingers through his hair while he gave all his attention to her breasts.

She moaned, feeling his erection pressed firmly against her. She was already so wet and called out when he used his teeth to bite down and pull on her sensitive nipple.

“Fuck I missed this.” he stated against her skin.

“Me too.” she agreed as she closed to her eyes and surrendered to the feeling of his warm mouth kissing and suckling on her breasts. She missed the soft scratch of his beard and the way he smelled. She ran her fingers through his hair and kissed the top of his head.

“I didn’t know you were coming home, I would have gotten a little cuter for you.”

“You’re kidding, right?” he gave her a sly devilish smile as he pulled off her yoga leggings and panties. “Not funny, Q. You’re plenty cute. I can’t handle you any cuter babe.”

“Not exactly a fancy corset though…” she giggled as he left a trail of small kisses up the inside of her leg.

“Fack off.” he laughed at her and sat up on his knees between her legs and pulled his t-shirt off. “If you could see what I’m lookin’ at…” he shook his head and moaned in delight “You’re fucking gorgeous, QBall.”

She rolled her eyes and giggled. She didn’t believe him, but loved how cute he was being.

“Hey! Do you know how many times I’ve thought about you and jerked off in the past two weeks?”

She burst out laughing, but he continued.

“…and just about every single time, I pictured me ripping my fucking hoodie off you.”

“You jerk off to me? Ya know, you could think about anyone. I would never know.” she teased.

“What can I say? You’ve ruined me for other woman. You’re the only chick I can get off to now.” he crawled back up her body and took her breasts in his hands and suckled on her nipple again, he simply couldn’t get enough. “Only you baby.”

“Damn straight.” she moaned and arched her back into him. The same was true for her.

She reached between them and fumbled with the button on his jeans, but gave up when she couldn’t get them open. Instead she palmed his impressive length and felt him push himself instinctively into her hand.

He quickly stood up and rid himself of his jeans. His large, thick cock sprang free and she licked her lips.

“It’s like you were made for me on a computer or something.”  he teased.

“Like _'Weird Science’_?’”

“Exactly.”

He scanned her naked body and noticed her admiring his cock and licking her lips. His heart swelled with pride. Jesus Christ, she could completely slay him without even trying.

“I really wanna fuck your mouth, babe, but I’m too keyed up. I won’t last two fucking seconds.”

He pulled her up off the couch then sat down and positioned her on his lap so that she was straddling him.

“Pity.” she playfully pouted and kissed the tip of his nose.

He collected her hair and held it together at the base of her neck. He pulled, making her chin point to the ceiling and left open mouth kisses up and down her neck.

She ran her hands over his shoulders and chest. His muscles flexed and he groaned, letting go of her hair so he could grab her ass with both hands.

“I missed you, Jake. Fuck I love you so much.”

She took his thick cock in her hand and stroked him slowly. She really did want him in her mouth. But settled for watching the look on his face while she stroked him. His blue eyes never leaving hers.

He couldn’t take it any longer. He positioned himself while he pulled her down towards him, entering her wetness ever so slowly. She felt every single amazing inch of him.

His eyes rolled to the back of his head once he was fully seated inside her. He let out a growl that was close to primal. She loved hearing his approval, she wanted to hear more.

“Fuck, Jensen. Did you get bigger when you were gone? I swear you feel bigger.”

“For real? Is that a thing?” he perked up and his face earnest lit up as he asked.

They laughed together while she rolled her hips. She went to do it again, but he had to stop her and held her on to her tight. The grip he had on her hips was powerful and sure to leave a bruise, it excited her and added to her wetness.

“Fuck stop, babe, or this will be over before you know it.” he moaned and tried to catch his breath. “Christ, you feel so good.”

She wrapped her arms around his neck kissed the corner of his mouth.

“You feel good, too. So good.”

“You’re my home, Quinn. Balls deep. I’m so stoked to finally be home.”

“I love how you make _‘balls deep’_ sound so romantic.” she giggled and rolled her hips again. She needed to move and feel him, she was just as keyed up as he was. It’s been a long two weeks for her too.

“You miss me, baby?”

She panted and nodded her head.

“You miss my cock?”

“Fuck, J.” she moaned hearing his dirty words and feeling him push up inside her.

She threw her head back as she rode him slowly. She looked down at him and he seemed distracted like he was looking for something on the couch.

“Bored already?” she teased and deliberately squeezed her inner walls around him.

“Not a chance. _Ahh_. Do that again.”

He rested his head on the back cushion of the couch and enjoyed her riding and squeezing him. He felt around and found what he was looking for. Then pointed the remote at the TV behind her and turned it on.

“It’s almost midnight…” he explained to her breasts as he foundled them and rolled her nippples between his thumbs. “Fuck, I love you.”

He swiftly spun them both around so that she was underneath him again on the couch and thrusted himself as far into her as he could. He wanted to feel everything. The noises she was making were driving him insane. She pulled and clawed at his back and he didn’t think he was going to make it to the countdown. He tried to keep his movements careful and slow, but she wrapped her legs around his waist and his leisurely pace increased to a harder more punishing one.

He was practically fucking her into the couch cushions. She could tell that he was close and encouraged him to finish.

“Come, baby. Come on, J, come for me.” she panted and purred in his ear.

He groaned through his teeth came shortly after hearing her words. He laid his body weight on top of her and buried his face between her neck and shoulder trying to catch his breath.

“I’m sorry, babe. I couldn’t…”

“Shh.” she cooed and ran her fingers up and down his sweaty back. “I’m just so happy you’re here with me.” she was disappointed she didn’t come as well but meant every word.

He startled her when he jumped off her suddenly and pulled her up by her arm.

“Fuck it. We still have time!”

“What? Time for what?” her legs felt wobbly as she stood naked in her livingroom trying to figure out what he was up to.

“Time to _ring in_ the New Year.”

He sat down on the couch and spread his legs wide and motioned for her to sit between them. She smiled sweetly and played along and sat with her back against his chest. A part of her still couldn’t believe he was home. As sexually unsatisfied as she was, she was still so happy just to feel his body against hers.  

He made his intentions known when he used his legs and to spread hers apart.

“I wanna make you come.”

He collected her long hair off her shoulder and kissed up and down her neck and along her shoulder.

“I’ve thought about making you come so many times…”

One arm wrapped around her then pinched and squeezed her breast hard. The other wrapped around the other side of her and found her clit. He spread her wetness over her sensitive nub and ran circles over it. He listened to her respond to him and matched his speed accordingly.

The glow of the television light up her face as he watched her react to him. It didn’t take long for her to feel his dick twitch and grow behind her back. She loved how he touched her and knew her body. She listened to his breathing and his soft gentle praise as he kissed and bit at her shoulder. Everything she was feeling was so intense. She felt her desire swirling in her belly, her release was close.

He could feel how fast her heart was beating and doubled his efforts. She was going to come hard, he could tell. He almost didn’t want the moment to end. It dawned on him that she was completely his. He’ll always remember how she rested the back of her head against his shoulder and surrendered to him. She tilted her head towards him and the look of bliss on her face was so powerful, he buried his nose into her soft hair and fell in love with her all over again.

He felt her legs tremble and shake against his when the countdown started. Just a moment after the new year began, she called out and came hard against his fingers. He couldn’t have timed it better if he tried. He let go of her breast and wrapped his arm around her waist and held her close until she finished. He tried to draw out her orgasm as long as possible. She was beautiful.

She cuddled herself up into a ball in his lap and felt him kiss the top of her head. He smiled and grabbed the blanket from the back of the couch and wrapped it around them both. He was so happy to be home. He wasn’t sure he would be strong enough to leave her again.

“Happy New Year, Jensen.”

“Happy New Year, Q.”

He pulled her face up to his and gave her a proper kiss on the lips. He was finally kissing the woman of his dreams on New Years.

They continued softly kissing and making out on the couch. The festivities on TV were dying down when a breaking news report came on:

_“Breaking News. Details are sketchy, but reports are in on an international human trafficking ring that has been brought to justice. No word yet on who’s responsible…”_

“Ah shit!” Jensen fumbled with the remote and turned the channel.

“What? Is that you guys?” Quinn was beaming with pride and could have sworn that Jensen was blushing. “It was wasn’t it! Well done, my love. It was all worth it huh?”

“Yeah, but it’s getting a lot harder to leave. Ya know.”

“I know.” she kissed his cheek and he played with her hair.

They laughed and showered together and gently made love in their bed for a second time. Finally Quinn could sleep soundly in Jensen’s arms. Before she drifted off to sleep she vowed never to take these moments with him for granted.

The boys were going to be so happy to see their dad. It took all of Jensen’s self control not to wake them up when he looked in on them before they went to bed. His man cubs were perfect in every way, he couldn’t wait to hang out with them.

But they brainstormed and discovered that he fit perfectly inside the large box his snow racer from Annie came in. Cooper and Jackson were going to open another present. They couldn’t wait to see their little faces light up in the morning.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! xo


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